


Everybody Lives and Nobody Dies

by polverine



Series: The Bright and Wonderful Life of Sirius Black and Marlene McKinnon [3]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Everybody Lives/Nobody Dies, F/M, Fluff and Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-03
Updated: 2020-03-26
Packaged: 2021-02-28 05:41:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 40
Words: 34,102
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22548727
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/polverine/pseuds/polverine
Summary: (An alternate to part two. Here, everybody lives and nobody dies.)A continuation of ficlets following the lives of Sirius and Marlene.
Relationships: Sirius Black/Marlene McKinnon
Series: The Bright and Wonderful Life of Sirius Black and Marlene McKinnon [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1622290
Comments: 118
Kudos: 88





	1. VIII

**Author's Note:**

  * For [fluffernutter8](https://archiveofourown.org/users/fluffernutter8/gifts).



“I think that went very well.” Sirius laughed as they climbed into bed that night. Marlene propped herself up on her elbow and squeezed his hand.

“I’m so sorry about my brother, he was so rude to you.” She sighed. Her brother had been the only one who hadn’t been happy for them when they announced the pregnancy. He’d never thought that Sirius was good enough for Marlene, plus it probably didn’t help that he remembered him from school. Jeremy was a few years older, very uptight and strait-laced…something no one could, or would, ever accuse Sirius of being. 

“You defended my honour beautifully.” Sirius grinned. “I just can’t imagine why Jezza doesn’t like me.”

“I mean it could have something to do with the fact that you won’t stop calling him Jezza, and now it’s catching on.” Marlene laughed.

“It doesn’t matter, at least your sister likes me.” 

“Nicole fancies you.” Marlene said pointedly. “It’s nothing but Sirius this, and Sirius that.” 

“Bless her, but you don’t need to be jealous, she’s like twelve years old.” Sirius teased, he didn’t think Marlene had been jealous of another girl in her life…if she had she’d hidden it very well.

“Fifteen.” 

“Still a baby.” He shrugged. He reached over and took the little velvet box out of the bedside table. He opened it and set it on the mattress between them. Marlene stared at it, the engagement ring twinkling up at her, apparently lost for words.

“What’s that?” She finally asked. 

“It’s a Flobberworm.” Sirius bit sarcastically. She told him to go fuck himself and he smiled. “Marry me?” He’d marry her for that foul mouth alone. 

“That is a big and and beautiful ring.” She breathed, picking it up for a closer look.

“I’m a _big_ and beautiful man.” He smirked, and as much as she was trying to fight it, she laughed. 

“I fucking hate you, Sirius Black.” 

“I hate you too, Marlene McKinnon…so, will you marry me?” He asked again, though he was quite sure now that the answer would be yes. 

“This diamond…I’m left handed, I’m not going to be able to lift my wand, you know that right?” She grinned.

“I can exchange it for a smaller one.” He said, feigning concern and trying to take the box from her, but she snatched it away. 

“Don’t you dare.” She grinned, still not putting it on. 

“Will you marry me?” He asked again, he was going to keep asking until she actually answered. 

“Did you ask the bobblehead if you should propose?” Her expression was blank as she asked this and he faltered…He could lie and say no, but she would know that he was lying.

“Obviously.” He said after a few moments of quick calculations. “It nodded, and then I asked it if you should say yes—”

“I’m going to assume that it nodded?” She smiled, he knew that she was playing with him, drawing it out. She was driving him mad and it was fun for her. He was tempted to try and take back the ring, she’d probably say yes pretty quickly. 

“Will you—”

“Yes. Of course I will.” She grinned, slipping the ring onto her finger and kissing him. Sirius pulled her to him. She was the most infuriating person that he had ever met. “One condition…” Sirius sighed and fell back on to the pillows.

“Go on.” He said, trying and failing to keep the frustration out of his voice.

“We wait to get married until all this is over. When it’s safe for Lily and James to be with us.” She said sadly. He understood completely, the idea of not being able to have James stand at his side was repellant. 

“We wait until it’s safer.” He agreed.


	2. IX

Sirius and Marlene used Disillusionment charms for good measure. Extra precautions were necessary when visiting James and Lily now, the last thing they wanted was to lead Voldemort right to their door.

Lily noticed Marlene’s small bump as soon as they entered the Potter’s living room, she’d forgone the baggy jumper for just that reason. 

“You’re not?” She beamed. It took James a few seconds longer.

“Congratulations!” He grinned, then added in an undertone, jerking his thumb at Sirius. “With this guy though, really? I think you could have done better.” James dodged as Sirius aimed a kick at him. 

“I’m fairly sure it’s his.” Marlene smirked, bending down to pick Harry up out of his walker. She pretended to nibble on his cheek and Harry giggled. “Oh and…” She flashed them her left hand. 

“Drinks all round!” James clapped his hands together, gave Marlene a peck on the cheek and pulled Sirius in for a quick hug, before disappearing off into the kitchen. They heard the pop of a champagne bottle and Harry started at the noise, looking around wildly. For a moment Sirius thought they were safe but then he started to cry.

“It’s okay Sweet Pea.” Marlene cooed, but Harry was reaching over her shoulder for Sirius. He forced himself not to poke his tongue out at Marlene as he took Harry from her arms. 

“What are all these tears for, kid?” He asked, bouncing him slightly. After a moment, Harry stopped crying. Marlene rolled her eyes and took James’s seat on the sofa. 

“I’m not sure I’m okay with this favouritism.” She huffed, as Lily took her hand to look at the ring. 

James returned carrying four glasses of champagne, he handed them out but hesitated when he got to Marlene. “Or would you prefer orange juice?” He asked.

“Half a glass won’t do me any harm.” She smiled, taking it from him. 

“Alright.” He raised his glass. “A toast, to the future Mr McKinnon and Mrs Black, and their baby…may it take after its mother.” 

“Prongs.” Lily, reproached with a laugh, while Sirius made an obscene gesture at him behind Harry’s back.


	3. X

“What are you doing?” Sirius asked, coming up behind Marlene and wrapping his arms around her waist. Remus and Peter would be here soon and they could tell them about the baby. She had pinned a huge piece of parchment to the living room wall, scraps with names, locations, events, all crammed together. The names were all members of the Order.

“I’ve been trying to find out who the leak is. These people…” She muttered, sliding Edgar Bones’s name over to a column along the right side with her wand. “are cleared.” 

Sirius looked down the list, Edgar Bones had joined a list of names that included his own, Dumbledore’s, Moody’s, the Longbottoms, Dearborn’s… “You’ve been investigating the rest of the Order?” He frowned. “Since when?” 

“Since Benjy Fenwick exploded all over me. The Death Eaters knew where to find Edgar Reed.” Marlene muttered, picking up a pile of notes and looking through them. Sirius felt his heart sink. He thought she’d been okay, but this…didn’t seem normal. Very Alastor Moody. _Constant vigilance_ and all that. He took a closer look at the parchment, names that hadn’t made it yet to the ‘cleared’ list included Emmeline Vance, Mundungus Fletcher (that one, Sirius thought wryly, was understandable) and—

“Moony and Wormtail?” He frowned. No way were either of them a spy. 

“I have to be _sure_ , before they go on the list.” She mumbled, chewing on her bottom lip. There was a trace of shame in her voice. 

“But you’re sure about me?” Sirius asked dryly, he knew he was no spy, obviously…but neither was Remus or Peter.

“You would rather die than put my life at risk…or Lily, James and Harry’s.” She said with so much confidence and faith that his heart swelled. 

Sirius pressed a kiss to her temple. “So would Moony and Wormtail.”

“You’re probably right, but I have to make sure for myself.” She mumbled. With a flick of her wand the parchment rolled up and put itself, along with the notes, away in a cupboard. 

“You know, if you show all that to Moody you’ll probably be hired as an Auror on the spot.” He teased. He ran his thumb distractedly along the thin red marks that snaked from nape of her neck and down her back. They’d faded considerably since their fifth year but they still caused a dull rage to bubble in the pit of his stomach. Marlene reached back to still his hand.

“Sorry, does it still hurt?” He asked, moving his hand back to her stomach. Marlene shook her head and turned in his arms to kiss him softly. The doorbell rang and he let out a groan. 

“That’ll be Remus and Peter. I’ll make the tea.” She smiled, pecking his lips and slipping out of his arms. She looked so pretty as she walked away, locks of hair escaping her messy bun, floaty summer dress brushing her thighs. He was rather tempted to tell them to come back later.

Sirius opened the door, he looked from Remus’s shabby t-shirt to Peter’s long sleeves. “Merlin’s beard Wormy, you’re worse than Marlene. It’s the hottest day of the year.” He muttered incredulously.


	4. XI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> November 1975

“Come with me and Severus to Hogsmeade tomorrow.” Lily said, grabbing hold of Marlene’s arm as she tried to pass her in the common room. 

“Sure, right after my date with the giant squid.” Marlene muttered, she heard Sirius sniggering from his armchair by the fire. She loved Lily completely, but she just didn’t get what she saw in Snape. “I hate him Lily, and I can’t understand why you don’t.” All four Marauders had turned to look at them now, along with a couple of nosy third years and an irritated seventh year. 

“Don’t be like that Marlene, he’s not so bad—” Marlene rolled her eyes.

“Show her what he did.” Remus said calmly, setting his book down on the table. Marlene shot him a warning look, but James and Sirius had already straightened up in their chairs. They would never let the subject drop now. Biting down hard on her tongue, Marlene whipped her jumper off and bunched her long hair on top of her head. As she turned to show Lily the long red marks snaking painfully down her neck, along her back and disappearing beneath her camisole, she heard Sirius’s sharp intake of breath. 

She dropped her hair and turned back to Lily. “Madam Pomfrey said that they should fade in time, but as I couldn’t tell her what the spell was, and I wouldn’t tell who had done it…” Marlene McKinnon was no grass, and she’d hexed him right back.

“Shall we, Padfoot?” Out of the corner of her eye she saw James get up.

“I think we shall, Prongs.” The boys made for the portrait hole. 

“What the fuck do you two think you’re doing?” Marlene asked, though she had a very good idea what they were about to do. 

“Defending your honour.” Sirius said simply.

“ _Daring, nerve and chivalry set—_ ” James began in a sing-song voice, but Marlene glared at him.

“Sit back down.” She ground out. “I don’t need either of you fighting my battles for me.” She pulled her jumper on and looked back at Lily. She hated fighting with her. “He’s such a bad guy Lily—”

“He’s not, he’s just a little lost.” Lily said softly.

“This idiot is a little lost.” She said, jabbing her thumb in Sirius’s direction. “Snape is…” She trailed off. Snape was dark, and it made Marlene so scared for Lily. “The things he says about you are not okay. The things he does to people are not okay. You like saving people, that’s your thing…I get it, hell, I love you for it. But not everyone can be saved, Lily.” 

“I don’t believe that. I’ll talk to him, tell him that he can’t do that to people.” Lily whispered, she had tears in her eyes now and Marlene looked away. She hated seeing Lily cry, it made her heart ache.

“James, we’re going to be late for Quidditch practice.” She muttered, striding to the portrait hole and holding it open behind her. James looked between her and Lily, before reluctantly following her out. 

They started down the corridor but stopped when they saw Snape waiting at the end. As he pulled out his wand Marlene and James did the same. (Although when they past him she grabbed hold of James’s wrist ready to push his hand away if she needed to).

“Can you get Lily for me?” He asked her, ignoring James. James laughed humourlessly, trying to pull out of her grip.

“Get fucked, Snivellus. Marlene showed her what you did.” He hissed through gritted teeth.

Snape’s face blanched and he pointed his wand furiously at Marlene. James wrenched his arm free, but before he could decide on a spell she shoved him around the corner. They didn’t have time for this nonsense right now. James was seething mutinously beside her as they walked out into the downpour outside. Practice was going to be a nightmare.

“What did you stop me for?” He demanded. “You’re my friend, if you think I not going to stick up for you…and if you think Sirius is going to stand by when he’s completely—” James broke off quickly.

If Marlene hadn’t been so angry she’d have insisted that he finish that sentence. “Did you not listen to a word I said before or is your skull just so thick that nothing penetrates through? I don’t need you to protect me.” She snapped. 

“Where the hell have you two been?” Their captain, Ana Scott demanded as they stormed into the changing room. They got ready in angry silence, and Marlene could feel James’s gaze boring into her back. 

“Find something else to look at, Potter, or you’re not going to be able to see for the rest of the evening.” She hissed, pulling her robes on over her head.


	5. XII

“I can’t believe you told Remus and Peter that I was investigating the Order.” Marlene said, stabbing moodily at the pasta Sirius had just dished out into her bowl. He gave an exasperated sigh, though he’d been expecting this.

“Relax, they didn’t care…I mean I know Peter had questions but— Don’t look at me like that.” He warned when Marlene raised her eyebrows, and gave him a knowing look. “He’s always been a nosy prat…look I had to ask Remus what the name of that Muggle detective woman was so that I could make fun of you, and he’ll read anything.”

“Agatha Christie wrote detective stories, she didn’t actually investigate crimes.” Marlene muttered irritably. “Why does this bother you so much?”

Sirius ran a hand through his hair, he’d been cruel to take the piss, but he was now sorely wishing that he’d never asked what she was doing. “You’re investigating our friends, it feels dishonest…whatever happened to the Marlene McKinnon who wasn’t a grass?” He added this last part without really being serious (baiting her out of habit more than anything else), but Marlene threw her fork down into her bowl and stood up so fast that she toppled her chair. 

“For a start, you know that's not true, I told our teachers about things that mattered. But if you think that not ratting out Slytherins I got into fights with and trying to find out who’s been selling us all out to Voldemort are even remotely…what the fuck is wrong with you?!” 

“Marley.” He tried. “I don’t. I didn’t mean—”

“Benjy was your friend, don’t you care that he’s dead?” She challenged.

“Of course I do.” Sirius said sharply, how could she even think that?

“It was supposed to be you with Benjy at Reed’s house…if it had been you who’d been killed…” Her eyes had welled up with furious tears. 

“Marls—”

“Or,” She continued, a little shrilly now, “consider how easily it could have been _me_ that was blown into a million pieces.” Sirius stared up at her, his heart pounding against his ribs. In the wake of that evening it was a scenario that had plagued his nightmares with almost the same frequency that his sleeping mind had forced him to re-witness her torture. 

Neither of them spoke for a few moments. “I’m not hungry. I’m going for a walk.” She finally said, before striding from the room and Sirius heard the front door slam. He pushed away his own full bowl. She was right, what the fuck was wrong with him? He got to his feet and returned to the living room, pulling all of her notes out of the cupboard. He could at least _try_ to help her, maybe he’d be able to spot something that she hadn’t.


	6. XIII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> November 1975

Marlene was in such a bad mood the following day that she turned down both Remus and Mary’s invitations to Hogsmeade. No, she would mooch around for an hour or so and then head back to the castle to tackle the mountain of homework. In fact, her mood was so foul that that she considered jinxing Snape as he walked ahead of her with Lily along the high street — but Lily would be so furious with her if she did that. (Maybe she _was_ spending too much time with James).

“Ah, just the girl I wanted to see.” Called Slughorn, and Marlene groaned inwardly as he approached. 

“Good morning, Professor.” She said with a fake smile. 

“You’ve stopped coming to my little gatherings, you’ve not been to one all year.” He accused jovially, stepping closer. Marlene took a step back.

“Oh, you know. It’s OWL year, I have lots of homework.” She shrugged.

“Now, now. That doesn’t stop Lily Evans. She loves them.” He said, waggling a stubby finger at her.

“Well…” Marlene said, trying to think of another excuse. “Lily doesn’t have Quidditch practice.”

“You know, your brother loved my little club. Not a bad potion maker really, but he was excellent at Ancient Runes and History of Magic—”

“And at boring us all to sleep.” Marlene grinned dryly. Slughorn let out a booming laugh.

“Ah, that sibling rivalry is still going strong! Wonderful!” Marlene had now stepped so far back that she hit the wall of Honeydukes. She felt a hand slip into her’s and she looked up. Sirius had appeared beside her so suddenly that for a wild moment she thought that he’d apparated. 

“Want to get a drink?” He asked. She looked past him to see James, Remus and Peter watching them curiously from the doorway of Zonko’s.

“Sorry Professor, I’ve got to go.” She said quickly, giving Sirius’s hand a grateful squeeze.

“I’ll get you back yet, Marlene!” Slughorn called after her as they crossed the street and entered The Three Broomsticks.

“If you’d stepped and further backwards, you’d have been stuck in a brick wall.” Sirius teased. “Find a table, I’ll grab us a drink.” Marlene looked around, it was still fairly early so students had yet to file in en masse. She chose her favourite table in the window and Sirius joined her, handing over a bottle of Butterbeer. “So Slughorn’s still trying to collect you?”

“Well, I suppose ‘re-collect me’ would be more accurate.” Marlene shrugged and added in a dignified voice, “and I’m not a _thing_ to be collected by anyone.”

“You know what your problem is, Marley? You’re brilliant.” Sirius smiled, before reluctantly muttering, “even more brilliant than me….But you don’t cause enough mayhem. Cause more trouble and he might go off you.”

Marlene laughed. It was very hard to remain in a bad mood when you were sat opposite a boy with a smile like that. They sat for a while in a comfortable silence, watching students walking up and down the high street. 

“Does it hurt?” Sirius asked, gesturing at her back when she cocked her head in confusion. 

Marlene nodded. “A bit, yeah.” 

“What happened?” He asked, his voice casual, but his expression darkening ever so slightly. Marlene sighed. She was quite surprised that Remus hadn’t filled them in already. 

“Remus and I were on our way back from the library, and there was this noise…like a whip crack, and it felt like my back was on fire. It knocked me to the ground it was so painful. Not so much that I couldn’t reach my wand and break Snape’s nose, mind.” She added with smug satisfaction. 

“The least he deserved.” Sirius muttered, taking swig of his drink as they fell into silence again. “James said practice was awful?”

“Awful is an understatement. We couldn’t see a thing.” Marlene laughed. “I threw the Quaffle at the back of James’s head—”

“Yeah, that was deliberate though, right?” He grinned, and she smiled back…her eyes twinkling mischievously. 

“Then Ana and Eric collided into each other, and came off their brooms. Luckily they weren’t _too_ far off the ground, but we had to call it a night after—”

“Alright, McKinnon.” They both turned as Avery approached their table. “Wanna meet me and Mulciber in the Astronomy tower tonight?” He asked, a cocky smirk playing at the corners of his mouth. 

Marlene gave him a contemptuous look, took a sip of her drink and set the bottle down on the table. “If you were the last two guys on the planet, a Mountain Troll would still be the better choice.” 

“Run along, Avery.” Sirius laughed. Avery flushed red.

“You’re not as hot you think you are McKinnon, you’re just a slag. I figured a dirty little whore like you was a sure—”

Marlene had to kick Sirius very hard under the table as he knocked his drink over in the haste to reach for his wand. She shot him a warning look; there was a table of teachers on the other side of the pub. Avery gripped her shoulder hard, his fingers digging painfully into her skin, and pulled her closer to him. “Let go.” Sirius hissed.

“You know.” Avery whispered softly, brushing her temple with the tip of his wand. “I could always make you.”

Marlene plunged her hand into her pocket for her own wand. “ _Furnunculus!_ ” She shouted, at the same time that Sirius shouted “ _Anteoculatia!_ ” Clearly the implication of Avery’s words hadn’t been lost on him either. Avery stumbled backwards clutching his head as horns sprung up out of his skull and oozing blisters erupted over his face.

“Black! McKinnon! _What are you doing?_ ” McGonagall had been sat in the pub, and she looked livid. “Go back to the castle and wait for me in my office.” She snapped, weaving around the tables to Avery. 

Marlene chewed on her bottom lip as they waited for McGonagall, Sirius was sat in her chair with his feet on her desk…rather than looking even remotely concerned, he seemed bored. The kind of casual arrogance in the face of punishment that could only be achieved through regular rule breaking. 

“Get up!” McGonagall demanded, slamming the office door behind her. Sirius jumped to his feet and strode around the desk to stand beside Marlene. “Attacking another student, two against one! I am disgusted! I should ban you both from all future Hogsmeade visits. Explain yourselves, now.” 

Marlene could feel Sirius looking at her, waiting for her to say something, when she didn’t he turned back to McGonagall. “Professor, Avery threatened to put Marlene under the Imperius Curse.” He said quickly. 

“What?” McGonangall asked sharply, sitting down in her chair. “Marlene, is that true?” 

“Well that was the implication.” Marlene clarified. “I was defending myself…and Sirius—”

“It was a gut reaction Professor. I'm not apologising to Avery, so don’t even ask.” He said, an aspirational level of defiance in his voice. “I’ll take the Hogsmeade ban first.” 

McGonagall’s nostrils flared, she surveyed them for so long that Marlene felt her self shifting uncomfortably where she stood. “I am taking twenty points from Gryffindor. There was a table full of teachers you could have alerted rather than attack. I will be speaking with Avery and Professor Slughorn…please go back to the common room, you are not to return to Hogsmeade today.” She added. 

“Yes, Professor.” They said in unison. When they were well out of earshot Sirius muttered, “You know, I think that might be the first time McGonagall’s forgotten to give me a detention. Would you really not have told her?”

Marlene thought about it for a moment and then shook her head. “No. I’d have told her.” The fucking Imperius Curse…on the off chance he actually _could_ perform it, that was something that needed to be reported.


	7. XIV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> November 1975

Marlene sat in James’s usual armchair by the fire working on McGonagall’s essay; Sirius sat opposite, occasionally flicking screwed up bits of that morning’s _Daily Prophet_ at her and then looking around as though it could’ve possibly been someone else in the practically empty common room. “For fuck’s sake, Black.” She snapped, combing another tiny paper ball out of her hair, though the smile playing at the corner of her lips was betraying her. “Just because you’re already vanishing kittens…”

“The other day I overheard McGonagall tell Flitwick that I’m gifted.” He said smugly, puffing out his chest, and cracking his knuckles.

“You sure she didn’t say _special_?” She challenged with a smirk. “Anyway, none of you idiots hold a candle to me in Defence Against the Dark Arts, and everyone knows _that’s_ the coolest subject.” 

Sirius opened his mouth to retort but frowned. “Evans?” He was looking beyond her, to the portrait hole. Marlene spun around. Lily had just stepped in, closely followed by James, Remus and Peter. She looked very pale; James took his coat from around her shoulders. 

“Lily. What’s wrong?” She asked. Jumping to her feet and helping her into the chair she’d just vacated. “What happened?” She demanded at James, unable to keep the accusatory note out of her voice. Lily pulled off her own coat and hung it over the arm of the chair. 

“Don’t look at me like that. _I_ have’t done anything.” James said, sounding very offended. “Professor Sprout came down to Hogsmeade and took Valerie Miller back to the castle, that sixth year Hufflepuff that sort of looks like a rabbit. Her parents are Muggles, people are saying they were found murdered by Death Eaters this morning. Her brother, Greg, is in second year, Ravenclaw. The one Peter gave those giant eyebrows to.”

“Only ‘cause his aim is terrible.” Sirius smirked. Peter scowled at them.

Marlene sat on the arm of the chair and brushed Lily’s hair behind her ear. No wonder she looked so scared. It was easy to forget, when they were tucked away in the comfort of the castle, the horrors that were taking place outside. While they remained under the safe protection of various enchantments, their teachers, and more importantly, Albus Dumbledore…their families faced the prospect of murder at any moment. Some more so than others. It was normal, easy even (though certainly not enjoyable), to scan the _Daily Prophet_ for names of the recently deceased, but it was all brought to jarring reality when it was the families of one of their own.

“Death Eaters have kids too, one of them could have seen the Millers on the platform.” Remus said quietly. Lily looked sick, and Marlene was sure they were all thinking the same thing; Lily’s parents could easily be next. 

“Pete, go to the kitchens and get her a cup of tea.” Sirius barked, reaching forwards to give her hand a comforting pat. 

“Evans, tell them what _Snivvy_ said.” James muttered bitterly, and Lily mumbled for him to leave it alone. “Fine, I’ll tell them.” He shrugged. “He said ‘let’s hope your sister is next.’ Why are you friends with him, Lily?”

“He didn’t mean it.” Lily mumbled, though she sounded throughly unconvinced. “They don’t get along.”

Marlene had spent a good chunk of the summer at Lily’s, and privately she thought that Petunia was a bitch…but what a terrible thing to say.  
When Peter returned Lily thanked him for the tea and pulled her feet up on the chair, staring sadly into the fire. 

“Anyway.” Remus said sensing, like Marlene had, that Lily was done discussing the matter. “Did you really hex Avery in The Three Broomsticks?” He asked, looking between Sirius and Marlene. They smiled at each other. 

“You would’ve too.” Sirius shrugged, rolling up his completed essay and shoving it in his bag. “Vile piece of shit got what was coming to him.” 

The _Daily Prophet_ next morning confirmed that the Millers had indeed been murdered.


	8. XV

Tiny lights glittered prettily above the dance floor at Lily and James’s wedding reception, bathing them all in a soft warm light. Marlene laughed as James grabbed her hand and spun her around. She didn’t care that they probably looked ridiculous — neither of them were as graceful on the dance floor as they were on brooms…but all self-consciousness had evaporated, with an effectiveness that could only truly be achieved through years of friendship and a considerable amount of champagne. When the song ended she wrapped her arms around his neck in a hug, and he lifted her off the ground for a moment. Still grinning broadly, she returned to Sirius and kissed him softly. “I’ll be back in a minute.” She smiled. She pushed open the venue door and frowned. She was stood in their bedroom, wearing the t-shirt of Sirius’s that she’d put on for bed. This wasn’t right. She looked up, Avery was stood in front of her. 

“ _Imperio_.” Terror flooded her as she felt control of her own body slip away. “Kiss me.” She heard him say. And she did. This really wasn’t right, she could throw of the Imperius Curse, Sirius had commented before that it was a relief that she was so stubborn. So what was she doing? And where was the blissful happiness? The complete loss of fear and worry accompanied the spell? This wasn’t what this curse felt like, it _couldn’t_ be real. Tears rolled down her cheeks as she obeyed his every order. 

Then she was kneeling outside Reed’s house, pulling pieces of Benjy into her arms. She didn’t know how she’d got there, but it didn’t matter. As long as she could put Benjy back together everything would be okay. 

“ _Crucio!_ ” Peter laughed. Sirius hit the ground beside her, screaming and writhing in agony.

“Please.” She begged, clutching at Peter’s robes. “Stop it! He’s your friend!” But when Peter turned…it wasn’t Peter. The horrid face of Voldemort smiled down at her.

“ _Avada Kedavra_.” 

A car horn in the street outside blared and Marlene woke with a start, breathing hard. She reached out for Sirius in the lonely darkness, seeking comfort, but his side of the bed was cold. Hadn’t he come home yet? She got up and padded out into the living room, the details of her dream vanishing faster than she could try to recall them. Sirius was sat on the floor, surrounded by all of their notes. They’d been working solidly together for the last few weeks trying to figure out the identity of the spy. Whenever they weren’t on duty for the Order they were collecting more evidence and going over it until the early hours, at times until the the sky turned to morning’s misty grey. Last night though Sirius had gone to bed early and had left before she’d woken up. While he was gone, she’d figured out who was betraying them. She was sure of it.

“What time did you get in?” 

He looked nearly as awful as she felt. “About one. You were completely out of it. I didn’t want to wake you so I thought I’d just carry on.” She looked at the clock, it had just gone half three. “You’re crying.” He murmured, glancing up at her. Marlene touched her cheek, wiping away the tears. 

“Just a nightmare.” 

“Want to talk about it?” He asked, though he sounded distracted. She crossed the room and pushed him forward slightly so she could sit on the sofa behind him. He leant back against her shins and tilted his head up.

“I don’t really remember it.” She murmured, and he nodded, his attention returning to the papers in front of him.

“Peter’s the spy isn’t he?” He eventually asked, his voice hoarse. “I keep trying to find a way that it’s not him, but…” 

“Yeah.” Marlene mumbled. “I’m pretty sure he is.” She felt Sirius’s shoulders shake; he was silently sobbing; out of heartbreak or quiet fury, she wasn’t sure. She leant forwards and wrapped an arm around his chest, gripping the front of his shirt and running her fingers through his hair with her other hand. “I’m sorry.” She said, kissing his shoulder. “I’m so sorry.”

“I would have died before selling him out…James and Remus would have rather died…and he’s been betraying us.”

Marlene didn’t know what to say. She couldn’t even begin to imagine how this had happened, how anyone could betrayed their friends like that. They sat quietly for a while.

“He’s asked me to meet him for a walk tomorrow…I think he knows that I suspect him.” Marlene finally said. “I’ve already spoken to Moody, we think it’s a good idea—”

Sirius spun out of her arms and seized hold of her wrists. “Absolutely not.” He growled. Marlene’s back stiffened, the way it always did when someone tried to order her around.

“If he’s really the spy, then the chances are he’s either going try and lead me in to an ambush or try to do me in himself…Personally, I’m hoping for the latter.” She added grimly. She’d love the excuse to curse him. Sirius’s grip tightened, he looked terrified. 

“Exactly. I’m not letting my pregnant fiancée take an afternoon stroll with a suspected Death Eater.” 

Marlene glared at him. “First, since when have you ever _let me_ do anything? Second, you thinking that I can’t take Peter Pettigrew in a duel might be the biggest insult anyone has ever levelled at me. And third, you’re hurting me.”

Sirius let go faster than if she’d burned him.

“Marley, please.” He whispered. She pressed her forehead against his. 

“I’m not being stupid about this, Moody will be close by, as will other Aurors. If we can catch him…that’s a big win for us, I know you know that.”

“I can’t lose you.” He choked. “If he so much as points his wand in your direction I’ll kill him.” 

Marlene rolled her eyes. “I’m sure you will.” She said, placatingly. “Now, come to bed.”


	9. XVI

Sirius had been very reluctant to let Marlene go out that morning. (Not that he could have stopped her). He tried not to think about the fact that should something go wrong, he might never see her again. He wandered around the flat, alternating between man and dog…unable to decide which form made the stress easier to deal with. 

By the afternoon his worry had become unbearable. All forms of distraction he could think up were no longer working; he’d folded the washing, cleaned the bathroom…twice, put away the stuff they’d bought for the baby — not that there was much room — and all without magic. He began to pace the kitchen, a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach. It was half past twelve. She was probably with Peter by now. 

Marlene had been right, his concern that she couldn’t defend herself against Wormtail had been a colossal insult. That hadn’t been what had kept him awake all night, however. It was who that traitorous bastard was taking her to meet. Maybe Avery, or Bellatrix…Sirius bent over the sink and retched. But there was nothing in his stomach to bring up.

_But…_ the voice of reason in his head tried to reassure, _she’d walked away from them before._

Sirius stared at the clock, watching the hands travel painfully slowly, until he could not longer stand it. He got to his feet, turned on the spot and apparated to the little village on the outskirts of Milton Keynes where Peter lived. There was a small woodland that separated his road from a playing field; if he was going to try and ‘do her in’ (remembering how Marlene had phrased it last night with an amusement that felt very out of place with his current level of anxiety), that would be where. He walked down the street until he reached a house with an empty driveway, pushed the gate to the back garden and climbed the tall wooden fence at the other end. He didn’t need to change back into the dog to try and sniff them out, the shouts and flashes of light from spells told him exactly where he needed to go. Sirius set off at a run. 

Marlene shot a red stunning spell and it hit Travers square in the chest before he could block it; he slumped to the floor between Rosier and Dolohov's bodies. She was holding her right arm awkwardly against her side. Her shoulder dislocated. Sirius reached down and pressed two fingers to Frank Longbottom’s neck and felt a pulse.

“ _Rennervate_. He’s okay, Alice.” He said, as Frank opened his eyes and pushed himself gingerly to his feet. 

Alice was holding onto Moody’s shoulders; he was hunched over, blood spilling on to the ground in front of him. “Thank heavens.” She said. “Rosier’s dead…Here, Alastor, let me see.” 

Sirius touched Marlene’s lower back. “Are you okay?” 

“Just my arm.” She winced. “Dolohov hit me with…I don’t know what it was some sort of purple flame, but even with a shield charm it sent me flying. Peter’s out cold, though. Didn’t even get all of the ‘ _Avada_ ’ out but as soon as I’d stunned him these fuckers showed up— Ouch!” She yelped as Sirius tried to lift her arm.

“I’m sorry, but you’ve got to let me pop it back in.” 

Marlene nodded and gritted her teeth. Sirius gripped her elbow tightly and tapped her shoulder with his wand. He’d done it enough for James over the years; a bludger in their third year had left him with a permanently dodgy shoulder. Marlene’s popped back into place with a sickeningly audible crack and she let out a heartbreaking whimper.

“Thanks.”

Sirius glanced back and Moody and wished that he hadn’t…it looked as though half of his nose was missing. 

“Alastor, let me take you to St Mungo’s.” Alice said softly, but he shook his head.

“You need to finish your job, take these bastards in.” He said, though his voice was strained. Moody straightened up and disapparated.

“Which one of them did that?” Sirius asked, staring at the spot where Moody had vanished.

“Rosier.” Marlene muttered. “Listen, Sirius, I’m going to stay and help Frank and Alice. You should go, James and Remus need to know about Peter.”

Sirius opened his mouth to protest, but then sighed. She was right. He looked down at Peter in disgust. Hatred bubbling so close to the surface it felt like it would consume him. “Watch him.” He warned Frank. “He’s an Animagus. He can turn into a rat.” Pretty fucking fitting.

“What are you talking about?” Frank frowned. “He’s not on the register.”

“How do you know this?” Alice asked. Sirius felt Marlene’s hand close tight around his and he looked at her. “Don’t.” She whispered, shaking her head slightly. She was afraid for him, and for the life that they were building together. He understood that. But he’d broken the law, now he’d have to live with the consequences. 

“I’m an Animagus too, I helped him do it.” He muttered. He had to tell them, if Peter transformed and escaped because they hadn’t been prepared, Sirius would never be able to forgive himself. Peter had already caused so much harm when he was trying to hide that he was a traitor, he might be able to cause more damage if he was able to act openly. “I’ll see you tonight, Marley.” He said, kissing her cheek and brushing his fingers over her bump.

“If I’m asleep, wake me up.” 

Sirius disapparated.


	10. XVII

“I don’t believe it.” James muttered, running a hand through his hair. “Why would he…” He got up and then, as though he could no longer remember why, sat back down. Sirius had filled them in on everything that he and Marlene had discovered, and everything that he knew about what had taken place that afternoon. He watched as Harry clambered up onto Remus’s lap and made his little stuffed dragon walk up his arm to sit on his shoulder. “He’s our friend.” James’s voice caught in his throat. “Are you sure?”

“Rawr.” Remus growled half-heartedly, tickling Harry’s sides. Harry squealed in delight, not sensing the distraction of the adults in the room. He grabbed the dragon, slid off Remus’s knee and crawled to Sirius instead. 

“Did you miss the part where he tried to murder Marlene this afternoon? Yeah, I’m pretty sure.” Sirius bit, harsher than he had intended it to sound. 

“And she’s definitely okay?” Lily asked quickly, her head snapping round so fast that he was surprised that she didn’t crick her neck. 

“She’s fine, Peter didn’t stand a chance against her.” Sirius said, pride lacing his voice and filling his heart. “Remember that, Harry.” He added, brushing his fringe out of his eyes — the kid could really do with a haircut. “You ever need to hide behind someone, your Aunt Marls is your best bet.” 

“How did this happen? How could someone, anyone do something so unspeakably…” James couldn’t finish. He waved his wand, making Harry’s toys put themselves away in crate in the corner. Harry’s face lit up. 

“Daddy, ‘gain!” Harry demanded, toddling over to the crate and taking the toys back out. Lily gave James a look somewhere between exasperation and amusement as he made the toys float around Harry’s head. 

“We could have been nicer to him.” Remus reasoned, but there was something accusatory in the way that he said ‘we.’

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Sirius snapped. They’d been nice to him, _he was their friend._ So what if they’d teased him a bit? Sirius ripped into James and Remus constantly. Why should it have been any different?

“Are you saying this is _our_ fault?” 

“I’m just saying, James,” Remus sighed, crossing the room and setting his drink down on the mantlepiece. “that maybe he didn’t find your…our…jokes as funny as we thought he did.” 

“Bullshit.” Sirius huffed, putting his feet up on the coffee table and starring up at the ceiling.

“Sirius, you can’t swear in front of Harry anymore, he’s starting to pick up words.” Lily warned. “Remus, are you saying that you think Peter started working for Voldemort because you three idiots teased him a little bit— Do not bring up Severus or you and me are going to have a falling out today.” She added to James, who had opened his mouth to interrupt her. James caught Sirius’s eye, they smirked but stayed quiet. 

“I’m saying that I think that there’s a chance that it could have contributed…and I don’t think anyone here really believes that Snape became a Death Eater because we were mean to him.” Remus said. 

“They’ve taken Peter into custody?” James asked, but Sirius knew what he was really asking.

“I’ve told them that he’s an unregistered Animagus.” Sirius said. “I’ve admitted that I am too, and that I helped him…I didn’t tell anyone about you.”

“You should have—”

“James!” Lily said, snatching Harry up off of the floor. Sirius recognised the same look of panic he’d seen earlier on Marlene’s face. Harry struggled to get out of her arms but she held him tighter. 

“No, Lily, it was just as much me…Sirius, I love you and I’m not going to let you take the blame for this by yourself.” 

“None of it will matter.” Remus muttered. “He’s been selling us all out for who knows how long. He’s going to tell the ministry anything that it might reduce his sentence.”

Remus was right, Sirius would be surprised if the fucking rat spent any time in Azkaban. 

“Did you know what the punishment would be before you became—” Lily started, but Sirius cut her off.

“Yes, we did. We didn’t care, it was worth it.” He said, looking at Remus. “I wouldn’t change a thing. You, James?”

“Not a thing.”


	11. XVIII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> December 1975

Beatrice McKinnon apparated into the kitchen halfway through dinner. She looked irritable and exhausted. Marlene wasn’t surprised, the Muggle-Worthy Excuse Committee seemed to have more and more work to do every day. 

“Bad day, Mum?” Jeremy asked, pouring her a glass of wine as their dad brought her plate over. 

“Thank you, darling.” Beatrice smiled faintly, taking sip. “A very bad day, but the Minister has finally given us leave to recruit more personnel.”

“Don’t you think the association to Muggles is going to make people reluctant to apply?” Jeremy asked. “You-Know-Who—”

“Seriously, Jezza. Just call him Voldemort.” Marlene muttered. Jeremy and their mother both flinched, and their father knocked over his glass, cursing under his breath. 

“ _Evanesco_. How many times do you have to be told not to say that name!” He snapped. 

“And don’t call me Jezza.” Jeremy hissed. 

“Mummy?” Nicole asked. “You said we’re not allowed to swear either. Which is worse to say, Voldemort or fuck?” 

Marlene spat out her drink as she snorted with laughter, but she was apparently the only one who was impressed with Nicole’s comic timing. Not bad for a ten-year old. 

“Marlene, stop laughing right now, this is your fault. Nicole, go to bed.” 

Marlene winked at Nicole. They listened to her stomp angrily up the stairs, needlessly slamming every door off the landing. And her parents thought that _she_ was a handful? Nicole was going to be so much worse. 

The rest of dinner was entirely uneventful. Possibly to make their mother feel better, Jeremy had promised to consider applying for a transfer to her department. Marlene had great difficulty not rolling her eyes when he smiled smugly at their father's praise of his consideration.

Nicole was lying on Marlene’s bed reading a piece of parchment when Marlene returned to their room. “Who’s Sirius?” She asked, waving the parchment at her. Marlene froze, and spotted her name at the top. “Do you have a _boyfriend_?” 

“Are you reading my letter? Give it back!” She dived at Nicole but she dodged out of the way. Marlene gave chase as Nicole ran out onto the landing. She caught up at the top of the stairs and tackled her, snatching back the letter. 

“Ouch! I’m telling Mum.” Nicole whined. Marlene ignored her, returned to their room and locked the bedroom door. She smoothed out the parchment and began to read.

_Dear Marlene,_

_Remus says that Craig Platt asked you to go back out with him, is that true? You can’t seriously be considering it, the guy is such a prick. He’s so full of himself, and he talks down to you. Come on, Marls, you deserve so much better than that. You know you do.  
How are your Christmas holidays going? Things are pretty quiet at school, most people have gone home to be with their families. James has stayed to keep me company, though. He said that his parents have gone away and he didn’t fancy going to Canada when Scotland is cold enough, but I can tell when he’s lying. _

_Give Jezza my love.  
Sirius._

_P.S. Last time you went out with Craig you were in fourth year and he was in sixth. That’s just creepy. It’s still creepy now._

_Dear Sirius,_

_I don’t know where you get the nerve calling anyone full of themselves! You’re one of the most arrogant people I’ve ever met! Yeah, Craig asked me out, and I said yes. But how is it any of your business? I could do a lot worse than him. You heard Avery, you know what people at school think of me. Craig has never said anything like that.  
I know, it’s a low bar. Just drop it, okay?  
My holiday is going okay, caught Nicole reading the letter you sent though so I need to think up some proportional revenge. She’s turning out to be a right little shit, Hogwarts isn’t going to know what hit it next year and no one ever suspects the cute ones.  
Jezza says not to call him Jezza. (Even Nicole has started doing it now)._

_Marlene_

_P.S. How is me going out with Craig any different than you snogging Rachel Lee? She’s also in seventh year!_

_Dear Marlene,_

_First off, fair call on the arrogance thing, don’t really have a defence for that. Secondly, not everyone talks shit about you, so raise the fucking bar a bit. Thirdly, it’s different because I didn’t know that you knew about me and Rachel._

_Merry Christmas Eve,  
Sirius_

Before Marlene’d had time to respond to this letter, another Hogwarts owl dropped an envelop off for her on Christmas morning. She pulled out a photograph of herself sitting in one of the armchairs by the Gryffindor fire, (opposite Sirius — she recognised the back of his head). She was talking animatedly to him, laughing as she told a story, though now she couldn’t remember what. She did remember the evening though, she’d returned to a relatively empty common room after waking up and not being able to drop back off. No make up, pyjama shorts, fluffy red knee socks with little lions on them, jumper hanging off one shoulder. And all the people she could’ve run into in the common room the universe had chosen Sirius Black, who never failed to look fucking flawless. James and Ana had been in the corner of the room going over plans for their first match of the season and Marlene had tried to walk right past the armchairs to join them; but Sirius had spotted her and called her over. On the back of the photograph, he had written: 

_Dear Marlene,_

_James developed the photographs we’ve taken since the start of term and I asked him to do an extra one of these for you. I don’t care about those bullshit rumours because I see you how you really are. You are vibrant and witty. So kind and brave, and so brilliantly intelligent. You’re the best in the year at Defence Against the Dark Arts, if not one of the best in the school, (you like to show off in that class a little bit too much, but as you’ve pointed out, I have no right to call anyone else full of it). You’re way too scared of getting told off by Professor McGonagall and you like apple crumble the most when it’s made with extra cinnamon. You turn into an excited child when it starts snowing and you hate to lose, especially at Quidditch. You love your friends deeply and you believe in honour, and decency, and loyalty.  
Craig thinks you’re hot and honestly, you should be insulted. You’re breathtaking. _

_Merry Christmas,  
Sirius_

Well fuck. Now what was she supposed to do?


	12. XIX

“I’ve been thinking.” Marlene said tentatively as Sirius placed his head on her chest and began to trace lazy patterns across her bump. He was going to have to get up soon, even if only to make breakfast, but this was nice. It had been so long since they’d had the time to waste half the morning in bed.

“That never ends well for me.” He huffed. He was sure that she rolled her eyes. 

“I’ve been thinking about this flat. It’s barely big enough for us two, it’s going to be impossible when Minerva arrives. She’s not going to have a room of her own, and there’s no space in here to put up the crib. At this rate she’ll be sleeping in a bassinet between us.” 

“What’s wrong with that?” Sirius asked, honestly he didn’t mind the idea of keeping the baby close. At least that way they would know that she was safe. They had taken Marcia Glenn’s gender divining spell as a given now, if it actually did turn out to be bullshit then their son was going to be wearing a lot of pink.

“Nothing at first, but it might cause a bit of a problem if we ever want to give her a sibling.”

“I don’t know about that, pretty sure we made this one in the shower.” Sirius smirked.

“Grimmauld Place is just sat empty—”

“No.” Sirius said flatly. He wasn’t going to move back to that house of nightmares. His life there had been miserable, did Marlene honestly think he’d want to raise their daughter in it? “Is that why you said you’d marry me? To get your hands on Grimmauld Place?” He teased, though his voiced was strained with annoyance.

“Oh Sirius, honey, my scheme goes further back than that! In fourth year I heard that your parents owned a large property in a prime Central London location and you would one day inherit it, so I hatched my master plan to make you fall in love with me. All that’s left is for us to move in, push up the wedding, and for me to murder you in your sleep.” Marlene said, running her fingers gently through his hair.

“I hate you so much.” Sirius grinned, shaking his head. He sighed. “Our daughter deserves better than that house, you’ve only been there once. You don’t remember how miserable it is.” 

“It doesn’t have to be.” Marlene said softly. “We could fill it with so much love. I know you don’t have any good memories there, but you can make new memories.” 

Sirius knew that she wasn’t going to let this drop, once Marlene McKinnon set her mind to something that was it. But he owed it to their child to at least try. His new family deserved him at his best and he didn’t know how to be that in that house. 

“What’s going on in that big old head of yours?” She finally asked, dropping a kiss in his hair. 

“I don’t know how to be a good father in that house.” Sirius mumbled, but now that he said it out loud he realised how fucking stupid it sounded. Marlene was never going to be able to understand. He tried again. “My parents treated me terribly, they were cruel, and cold, and dark. I’m terrified that house will turn me into them. I don’t want to hurt my daughter. I don’t want her to grow up as miserable as I was.” 

“Sirius.” Marlene soothed. “Even on your worst day you could never…is that really what you’re worried about? You are such a good man, and you’re so full of love. Our child is going to be adored, she’s going to be so lucky to have you.” Sirius swallowed hard, her faith in him was so profound that didn’t trust his voice just yet. “Close your eyes.” She instructed. “Are you doing it, I can’t tell?” 

“They’re closed.” He chuckled.

“I wan’t you to try and picture her, say she’s five years old. Maybe she has my blonde hair, my pretty eyes…in fact, let’s just assume she’s going to look exactly like me. Everyone says I’m the better looking half of this relationship.” 

“Literally no one says that but me.” Sirius teased, and she pinched him on the arm. He pictured her the way Marlene suggested.

“Imagine sitting with her at Grimmauld Place, maybe in the kitchen.” Sirius bit down on the inside of his mouth but did as he was told. “Can you honestly tell me that there is a scenario in which you would ever do anything to hurt that little girl? Is there anything that she could possibly do that would make you treat her the way your parents treated you?” Sirius shook his head, squeezing his eyes tighter to stop the tears leaking out. “You are not your father. And you are certainly not your mother.” He could almost hear her nostrils flair in the way that she had said ‘mother.’ “Look, let’s go to the house, and if you really can’t stand the thought of living there again, we’ll find something else.” Marlene suggested. Sirius nodded, it seemed like a fair compromise.


	13. XX

Sirius watched Marlene potter around the kitchen, making tea. “So, I’ve been thinking.” He said, mimicking her tone from the other day.

“That never ends well for me.” She didn’t look round, but he heard the grin in her voice.

“Remember when I joked that if you showed Moody that research you’d be made an Auror on the spot?”

“Yes.” She said, her voice sounded colder but as she wouldn’t turn to face him he had suspicion that she was still smiling. “You called me Agatha Christie, we had a fight and I stormed out.”

Sirius chose to side-step this and continued on. “Why don’t you actually apply to be an Auror, you’d be fantastic.” 

“It takes three years of training.” Marlene said, turning round and leaning against the kitchen counter. “We’ll have a three year old by the time I qualify.” 

“I don’t see a problem, we can live off my inheritance and I’ll be home with her during the day. I’m not working, unless you count writing the odd article for _Transfiguration Today_. I’m just waiting for Professor McGonagall to retire so that I can take over her job.”

“Professor Black.” Marlene laughed. “You’re going to be waiting a long time, she’ll never retire and she’ll probably outlive us all.” 

“True, in that case I’m waiting for her to take over from Dumbledore, then I can take over as Transfiguration teacher.” He shrugged. Marlene set their cups of tea down on the coffee table and snugged into his side. 

“That hat is certainly neater than the last eight attempts.” She said, changing the subject, but he was sure that she was considering the suggestion.

“I’ve switched to crochet, turns out I’m better at it than knitting.” Sirius said, wrapping the wool around the crochet hook. “I’ll make her a matching blanket next.” 

“I think we should keep the first attempt just in case.” She said, getting back up to let in the owl that had just landed on the window ledge. It dropped a letter addressed to him on the table.

“Why? It was too big, it was barely even hat shaped.” He frowned. “Can you open that? I’m on a roll here.”

“Well this is your baby that I’m having…if her head is as big as your’s is then childbirth’ll be a nightmare.” She smirked. Sirius threw the ball of wool at her but she ducked. 

“I hate you so much.” He said, biting back a smile. “Open the sodding letter.” As she read her face turned serious. “What’s wrong?” 

“You have to attend a hearing at the Ministry on the ninth of November.” Marlene muttered. “Look, it’ll be okay, there’s no way they’ll really send you to Azkaban.” She said quickly, but there was that same look of fear in her eyes that he’d seen before.


	14. XXI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> January 1976

Marlene watched the snow thicken as they travelled further north, they had to be halfway back to school by now. She chewed her bottom lip thoughtfully, she’d not told Lily about the photograph that Sirius had sent her yet…and she didn’t know if she should. Lily was like her sister, she told her almost everything and while Sirius irritated Lily, she knew she preferred him to Craig. There was also the fact that Marlene wasn’t even sure if she _wanted_ to have to compete with Sirius’s following of enamoured girls, he seemed to be with a different one every couple of weeks.

“Lily—” She began, but the compartment door slid open and Craig flopped down beside Marlene. He draped his arm around her shoulders, grabbed her chin and kissed her.

“Want to go and see if we can find an empty compartment?” He asked.

“My Christmas was nice, thanks for asking.” Marlene said irritably. “How were the Alps?” 

“Oh yeah, sorry. The Alps were great! We’re going back next Christmas, you should come. I’ll teach you how to ski, you’ll love it. Won’t she Lily?”

“I’ve never been.” Lily muttered, not looking up from her book. She could feel the disapproval radiating off of her. The dislike of Craig wasn’t limited to Sirius and Lily, James had also sent Marlene a letter over the holidays — if you could call it that — it just read ‘ _Are you fucking kidding me?_ ’ She figured that it was in reference to her going out with Craig. Marlene wouldn’t be surprised if they formed a club.

“Wait, you don’t like snow, do you? You’ll probably hate skiing. We’ll go somewhere hot instead, I’ll clear it with your parents. They’re going to love me.” He said. Marlene resumed staring out of the window, not bothering to correct him. “So what do you say. Want to see if we can find a compartment of our own?” 

“Actually, Marlene’s going to check over my Defence Against the Dark Arts homework. It’s our first lesson back tomorrow.” Lily said, taking an essay out of her bag and handing it to Marlene, before she retuned to her book. 

“Fine.” Craig muttered, getting up. “I’ll see you when we get back to school.” But neither of them looked up at him as he left.

When Sirius returned to the common room after dinner he spotted Marlene sitting alone in the corner, writing in the margins of a copy of _Advanced Defence Against the Dark Arts_. He was about to go over and say hello when Craig crossed the room, sat beside her on the sofa and took the book from her hands. Scowling, Sirius turfed a first year out if his armchair and snatched up the latest issue of _Transfiguration Today_. 

“What’s up with you?” James asked, when he, Remus and Peter eventually joined him. Sirius glanced involuntarily over at Craig and Marlene. His hand was creeping its way up her thigh as they kissed. “Ahh.” He muttered and Sirius returned to the article on new wand techniques for the more successful vanishing of large animals. Maybe he should try vanishing Craig. 

“Craig stop it, people are staring.” Sirius heard Marlene say. He look over at them again and saw her shove his hand away from her leg. He strained his ears to hear the conversation.

“Well, let’s find somewhere more private.” 

“I’m not in the mood.” She said, sliding away from him as he went to kiss her neck. 

“It’s about him, isn’t it?” Craig hissed, standing up and jabbing his thumb in Sirius’s direction. Sirius moved the magazine closer to his face, heart pounding; he didn’t want Marlene to know he was eavesdropping. 

“Of course not.”

“You’re such a fucking liar, Marlene.” Craig seemed to be struggling to keep his voice down now, and more people were turning to watch them. Sirius’s grip on the pages tightened. 

“Craig, don’t be like this, I like _you_ , I’m with _you_.”

“Prove it.” Craig said, holding out his hand. Marlene caught Sirius’s eye for a moment but quickly averted her gaze. She took his hand and followed him out of the portrait hole. Sirius tossed the magazine aside, half tempted to get James’s cloak and follow them. 

“Sorry Padfoot.” James muttered. Peter offered him a toffee from the bag in his hand but he shook his head. 

They returned just under an hour later. Marlene looked miserable but, infuriatingly, they were holding hands. What the fuck did she see in this git? Craig tried to kiss her goodnight but she turned her face away and he caught her cheek instead. “Night.” She muttered, heading to the girls’ dormitory. 

“Marley! Are you alright?” Sirius called after her, but the door had already slammed closed.

“She’s fantastic.” Craig smirked, and Sirius’s hands clenched into fists. “Though stop calling her Marley.”

“She likes Marley.” He hissed. 

“Yes, but I don’t, it’s juvenile.” 

“I don’t give a fuck what you like or don’t like.” Sirius snapped, Remus had gotten to his feet and placed a warning hand on his arm but he shrugged it off. “What did you do?”

“I don’t think what me and _my girlfriend_ did is any of your business.” He pulled the photograph Sirius had sent her out of his pocket and waved it in his face. “And I’d appreciate it if you would stop sending her love letters.” 

Sirius snatched it off of him, feeling as though Craig had punched him in the stomach. “She showed this to you?” 

There was a loud bang and Craig flew backwards; he hit the wall and slid to the floor. Sirius spun wildly to see where it had come from. Lily was stood in the doorway to the girls’ dormitory, wand raised and her expression furious. He caught James’s eye, sure that he was also banking this moment for the next time Lily yelled at them for jinxing someone without warning. She continued to advance and James vaulted over the back of his chair. He grabbed her around the waist, and pushed her wand arm aside. 

“Get off me, Potter!” She seethed.

“Now, now Evans. I think he’s out cold, it’s hardly a fair fight anymore.” James said, though he looked like he was thoroughly enjoying seeing this side of Lily.


	15. XXII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> January 1976

“Go on without me.” Sirius said to his friends as he dawdled in the Entrance Hall. He wanted to talk to Marlene; he’d been watching her all through breakfast hoping that Craig would leave the table first but he hadn’t. He glanced at his watch, they only had ten minutes before Defence Against the Dark Arts, she had to be coming out soon, he didn’t think she’d ever been late to that lesson in her life. “Marlene!” He called, pushing off of the wall as she left the Great Hall with Lily. “Can I have a word?”

“I’ll catch up with you.” Marlene said to Lily. She looked off, tired maybe…but there was a shadow behind her eyes that was quite different from their usual sparkle. Sirius pulled the photograph out of his schoolbag. 

“Why did you show him this? So you could have a good laugh?” He asked, unable to keep the sting of betrayal out of his voice. She dropped her bag.

“I didn’t, it was in my bag, he must’ve…does it look like I’ve been doing much laughing in the last twelve hours?” She said. He had expected her to sound angry but this hollowness was far worse. She began to walk away; he darted forward and grabbed her elbow.

“Marley, are you okay?” She opened her mouth, hesitated and closed it again before nodding. Sirius didn’t let go however. Why had he sent Remus away, he was so much better at this sort of thing. He always seemed to know what to say to people, how to be of comfort. “Has Craig been pressuring you to…has he forced—”

“He hasn’t _forced me_ to do anything.” Marlene snapped defiantly, drawing herself up. 

“Marls, talk to me, please.” He begged quietly.

“He was pestering me, and we got into a fight about you. He saw us coming out of that third floor classroom on the last night of term and he’s convinced himself that something happened. I tried telling him that you wanted to learn how to cast a Patronus, but he didn’t believe I could perform the spell well enough to teach anyone, and I was too pissed off and distracted to prove him wrong…He wore me down, I was too exhausted to keep arguing with him.” She shrugged. “Was over quicker than a fight too.” She added wryly. 

“Marley.” He whispered, sliding his hand down her arm to take her’s, but she pulled it away. 

“He’s not a bad guy. He can be very sweet.” She said, and Sirius snorted. “He’s just jealous of you. Of what ever this sort of friendship is between us.”

Sirius handed her back the photograph and placed a kiss to her temple; trying to pour as much comfort, and kindness, and support into the gesture as possible. “Come on, we’re late.” He said, picking up her schoolbag for her.


	16. XXIII

Marlene stepped across the threshold to Grimmauld Place when Sirius held open the door for her. “Am I going to find a hideous portrait of you in the attic that’s going to explain all this?” She asked, gesturing at his face. 

“Very funny.” He muttered, flicking his wand to light the chandelier. It was a little dusty, but mostly it was exactly as he remembered it, portraits lining the walls of the long hallway, ornate snakes coiling around the lamps and the bannisters. He’d hit his head on that bannister when was seven, taking the corner too quick. He pressed his fingers into his scalp, not sure if he was imagining the feel of the scar beneath their tips. 

“Mistress! Mistress!” Sirius heard Kreacher before he saw him at the end of the hallway. “Mistress! The ungrateful swine has returned!” 

He felt panic creep up his spine, his mother had died, so why was Kreacher calling to her? Unless…the filthy little thing had always adored Bellatrix. Had she taken possession of his house? “Wand out.” He whispered.

“ _Filth! Abomination! How dare you return to this house! How dare you bring such shame upon my noble blood!_ ” Screamed his mother’s voice. They shared a look of confusion and proceeded deeper into the hallway. On the wall they discovered the source of the screaming: a life-size painting of Walburga Black, her skin pulled taught in fury. Sirius stared at it, horrorstruck; it was the most grotesque painting he had ever seen, and Hogwarts had some very ugly paintings. It was so lifelike that when she started to claw her fingers, as though to break through the canvas, Sirius actually stepped sideways in front of Marlene. “ _Blood traitor! How dare you return! How dare you bring your whore here!_ ”

“Shut up! You evil woman!” He tried to pull the canvas off of the wall but it wouldn’t budge. Marlene seized one of the curtains and nodded at the other one. At least they wouldn’t have to look at her while she screamed, and with considerable effort they yanked them closed. Mercifully, the painting fell silent. 

“I’d forgotten how charming your mother was.” Marlene smiled cheerfully. Sirius glared at her. There was no way their child was being brought up here if that nasty old hag was going to be screaming at her from the wall. “Relax, we’ll find away to take it down.” 

They climbed the stairs, part of him wanted to return to his old bedroom…curious to see how permanent his Permanent Sticking Charms actually were. His parents were sure to have attempted to strip it bare. He stopped on the first landing however, the door to the drawing room was ajar and the tapestry on the opposite wall caught his eye. Even before Marlene pushed the door open he knew he’d have been blasted off the family tree. Marlene crossed the room, he watched as she ran her finger down the golden thread to the burn mark where his name used to be. She looked back at him over her shoulder. “They burned off your name?” 

“More of a blast I’d bet, it’s what happens to the disappointments and blood traitors.” He explained with a shrug. He didn’t feel sad, he’d never wanted to be part of this family anyway. But reawakened a longing in the pit of stomach; what he would have given to grow up the way his friends had, the way Marlene had…in homes full of love and affection and support. He held his hand out for her’s and led her up all the way up to the fourth floor. He pushed open his bedroom door and beamed. It was exactly as he had left it the day he had run away, everything from the Gryffindor banners to the photos of his friends, to the posters of girls and motorbikes were still stuck to the walls. Marlene laughed, she let go of his hand and sat on the bed, shuffling back into the centre. A cloud of dust caught the sunlight and floated around her like glitter. She kicked off her high heels and patted the bed beside her. How she was walking around in them when she was this pregnant was baffling, but he was trying to choose his battles. 

“This is where we had our first kiss. Do you remember? Or is that just one of your many bad memories here?” She teased, raising an eyebrow. Sirius climbed onto the bed and kissed her deeply, pulling her on top of him. That had been his best memory here. She skimmed her lips over his, pulling back every time he tried to kiss her again. “I’m not sure I’m okay with the posters of the hot bikini models though. They might not be moving but they’re definitely laughing at me.” 

“Don’t look at them then.” He said, taking out her clip and letting her hair fall like curtains either side of them. He began to undo the buttons on the front of her dress but she grabbed his wrists and held them against the mattress. 

“Yeah, but I know they’re there. It’s distracting.” 

“They didn’t seem to bother you last time you were here.” He muttered, straining his neck and catching her chin with his lips.

“I wasn’t the size of a house last time I was here.” She said, letting go of his wrist to push the hair back off of her face. Sirius seized the opportunity to pull her face to his, laughing into the kiss. “Don’t laugh at me.” She mumbled, and he tried his best to compose himself. 

“Marley, you’re insane. For a start, you haven’t seen yourself from behind, you can’t even tell that you’re pregnant until you turn around, and even if you were ‘the size of a house’ as you put it, do you think I’m shallow enough to care? You’re having my baby. I love _you_ , the fact that you’re smoking hot has always just been a _very enjoyable bonus_ …and you’re the hottest pregnant lady I’ve ever met.” He added for good measure.


	17. XXIV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> February 1976

Marlene changed into her pyjamas and returned to the common room in a thoroughly good mood. If they played the rest of the season as well they had been in practice lately then the Quidditch cup was a sure thing. She glanced around for Lily but she must’ve still been in the library. 

“Marley!” James called, beckoning her over. She crossed to the fireplace and perched on the arm of Sirius’s chair. “Ouch, that bruise looks nasty.” Marlene glanced down at the darkening blotch on her thigh. Dougie had knocked a Bludger out of Eric’s path but it had hit her.

“It just grazed me, could’ve been worse, at least Madam Pomfrey isn’t having to repair my femur.” She shrugged.

“Well, aside from that, not a bad birthday, huh?” 

“Yeah, it was pretty good. Could’ve done without the double Potions though…and without you reminding Slughorn it’s my birthday, Pete.” She grinned, it had been a little embarrassing when he’d made the Gryffindors (and attempted to get the Slytherins to) join him in a rousing chorus of ‘Happy Birthday’. 

“Well, Sirius had a House Elf whip this up.” James said, placing a little cupcake on the table with a birthday candle sticking out the top of the icing. “Apple and cinnamon filling, with crumble sprinkles. Blow it out, we promise we won’t sing again.” 

“Thanks.” She smiled and blew out the candle. “This is really very sweet of you.” 

“There you are, Marlene. I’ve been looking for you all day.” Craig said, he leant over Sirius and kissed her. She pulled away awkwardly when Sirius cleared his throat in irritation. “Happy birthday.” He handed her over a present.

“Thanks.” She said, but frowned when she unwrapped it. _The Duty of Women: A guide to motherhood, homemaking and living up to the feminine ideal_ by Marcia Glenn. What the fuck?

“I figured you might find some stuff in there useful, especially when you finish school.” He smiled. Marlene stared at him in disbelief. 

“Have you read this book?” She asked him, out of the corner of her eye she could see James and Remus smirk at each other. Sirius put his feet up on the coffee table and looked from Marlene to Craig with the unmistakable air of someone settling himself down to watch a good show. 

“I’ve flicked through it.” He shrugged. “She seems to have some pretty good ideas.” 

James opened his mouth to speak but Marlene raised a hand to stop him. “Marcia Glenn is a batty old witch that poses a genuine threat to the wizarding community. Just because we’re at war doesn’t mean we should let this shit stand.” She said, waving the book at him. “Two things are going to happen tonight, this book is going on the fire, and then we’re going to break up.” 

“Don’t be so dramatic!” Craig snapped and returned to his friends. Using Sirius’s shoulder as leverage she stood up on the arm of his chair…for full dramatic effect. She opened the book at random and began to read in a ringing voice:

“ _Witches must be obedient and submissive to wizards._ ” She closed the book and opened it at another page. Craig turned back to watch her. “ _It is imperative that the Ministry of Magic pass legislation prohibiting married witches from seeking employment._ ” She flicked to another page. “ _Witches must actively seek to limit their magical ability to preserve the ego of their husbands._ Is this really what you’re looking for?”

“Isn’t every man? Hey!” Craig shouted as she tossed the heavy volume behind her into the flames, clearly he hadn’t thought that she was being serious. 

“Look, the rose on my bedside table this morning was nice, but we’re done now.” Marlene said.

“What rose?” He asked. Comprehension dawning, she looked down at Sirius. He offered her a small smile and a shrug. Craig advanced on him.

Marlene pulled out her wand, stepping across Sirius to stand on the other arm, carful to avoid his hand. “Don’t even think about it.” She said. 

Craig let out a cold laugh. “You’re okay hiding behind a girl like a coward?” He asked Sirius. She felt his fingers twitch against her foot at the word ‘coward’.

“Behind this girl? Absolutely. It’s the safest place to be.” He said matter of factly.


	18. XXV

Marlene ran her finger along the jagged pink scar on Sirius's bicep…honestly, she could barely even remember sealing the wound, there were details of that night that seemed beyond her recollection…except of course the ones that she wanted to forget the most — the feel of Benji’s flesh in her hands, the sight of him scattered around her in pieces, the pain of the Cruciatus Curse. She would love to not remember any of that. Sirius let out a sneeze and she jumped. “Bless you.” 

“Thanks.” He said. “Let’s start clearing the house out, the dust in this room is getting to me.” 

“So we’re moving here?” She asked, and he glared at her. 

“I didn’t say that.” His tone was short but she was sure that she was going to get her way. So the screaming portrait was a little bit concerning, but there had to be a way around a Permanent Sticking Charm if the caster had died. She got up and slipped her dress back on, moving to the window as she fastened the buttons. There was a patch of grass in middle of the square outside. Their children could play out there…and they weren’t too far from Regent’s Park either. Marlene looked at him over her shoulder, watching the way his back muscles moved as he pulled his jumper on. “You’re staring.” He grinned at her in the mirror. 

“Can you blame me?” She asked, crossing back to the bed and lifting his jumper to press a kiss between his shoulder blades. He reached behind him and threaded his fingers in her hair, letting out a contented sigh.

Sirius joined her down in the dining room on the ground floor with a rubbish sack and opened one of the cabinets. “Careful with some of this stuff.” He said, dropping a silver cigarette case that burned white hot when he picked it up. “I’d forgotten it did that.”

Marlene wasn’t listening however, she’d spotted a photograph of Bellatrix on the mantelpiece. Her throat felt tight and an odd chill of fear crept its way down her spine. Instinctively, she place a hand against her stomach, but felt stupid the second she’d realised that she’d done so. This was a fucking photograph, it was no threat to her safety, or her baby. _Get a grip, Marley_ , she thought bitterly.

“Bin them all.” Sirius said; she looked round at him, his gaze must have followed her’s and his eyes were now full of concern. 

“Sorry, I’m being an idiot.” She muttered, picking up the photos and placing them in the rubbish bag. 

“You’re not, it’s okay to be…” He shrugged, she thought that maybe he had considered saying ‘scared,’ but decided it wasn’t accurate enough. After all, she didn’t like admitting to fear. Marlene tried to think of a descriptor to supply for him, but they all seemed too extreme, thus also inaccurate: traumatised, broken, damaged. 

They worked cautiously through the cabinet, but when a razor jumped from the shelf and swiped her across the face Sirius slammed the cupboard door shut and called it a day. He ran his wand across the cut and a cooling sensation spread across her cheek as it healed. “Don’t worry, it won’t scar. Look, it’s getting late, we’ll come back in a few days and carry on. Let’s go and get something to eat.” 

Marlene touched her cheek, it was as smooth as it had been a moment ago. “Yeah, okay.” She conceded, there wasn’t much left in the dining room anyway. 

“Master Sirius and his whore are throwing out all of my mistress's treasures.” She heard Kreacher cry as he rummaged through the sack.

“Don’t ever call her that! Get out of it!” Sirius shouted, aiming a kick at Kreacher. Marlene pulled him back.

“Leave him be.” She said reproachfully, Kreacher was clutching Bellatrix’s photograph in his hands. “Let him keep a few things” 

“I don’t want any of this shit it my house.” Sirius hissed. “Especially not a photograph of that— _She tortured you!_ ” Marlene frowned, it was just a photograph, and Kreacher was obviously deeply attached to his family’s possessions. 

“How about this. We can’t have anything in house that’s going to attack us obviously…but if there’s anything Kreacher wants to keep, provided we can verify that it isn’t particularly dark, or dangerous, he can have it?” She suggested. Sirius glowered mutinously at her. “Where do you sleep Kreacher?” The elf ignored her. 

“Marlene asked you a question. Answer it.” Sirius ordered.

“The boiler cupboard.” Kreacher said, refusing to look at her.

“Well that won’t do.” She said heading back up to the first floor and pushing open the door to a small bedroom, not much more than a box room but still a damn sight bigger than a cupboard. There was already a small single bed and shelves on the wall. “How about Kreacher moves to this room?” She said, leaning over the bannister. “That way he will have plenty of space for anything he wants to keep, and you won’t have to look at any of it.” She said to Sirius. He had a very odd expression on his face as he looked up at her; Marlene wasn’t sure it it was irritation or affection. Maybe a little of both. 

“Would you like that, Kreacher?” Sirius asked, though it looked like it pained him to do so. 

“Yes, master.” He said, he seemed hardly able to believe his luck.

“Fine.” Sirius said, taking Marlene’s hand when she returned to the ground floor. “We’ll be back in a few days. Change the sheets in the bedrooms and do a bit of dusting. Please.” He added. His voice wasn’t exactly kind, but Marlene was pleased to hear that a lot of the hardness from before had gone. She knew this was difficult for him, but he was _trying_ and it meant so much to her.


	19. XXVI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> February 1976

Sirius was a sulking; he had been looking forward to having Marlene to himself this evening — it was Valentine’s Day. He’d initially been intending to see if she wanted to go to Hogsmeade with him, but McGonagall hadn’t accepted that as a good enough reason to get out of detention. He’d shrunk Craig's head a week after his chat with Marlene…she hadn’t given him any details about what had gone on between them on that first night back after Christmas and his imagination had been working over time. She said that he’d not forced her to do anything, just ‘wore her down’; it hardly sounded like she was a particularly willing participant. McGonagall had tried to give him a week of detentions for it but they conflicted with the detentions he and James were already doing for Flitwick…so she was taking six Saturdays from him instead. He’d been hoping that tonight though, if the moment was right…but as soon as he’d told his friends Marlene was teaching him to produce a Patronus they’d decided to tag along. He didn’t fancy an audience when he asked her out, in case she told him to go fuck himself. 

“I’m just saying, Moony, you’ve been a prefect with Evans for five months now, and she still thinks I’m a bloody tosser.” James said as the four of them made their way the empty second floor classroom where they were meeting Marlene.

“Have you considered that maybe it’s because you _are_ a tosser?” Remus asked. “No amount of talking you up can change that.”

“I’m not a tosser.” He muttered, looking back over his shoulder. “Tell him, Padfoot.”

“S’okay, Prongs, you’re not a tosser.” He grinned. “You’re a pillock.” 

“Oh shut up, we all know that’s Wormy.” He snapped. “You know what, fuck all of you. Evans would be lucky to have me, I’m a catch.” 

“Sure you are.” Remus said, shoving him forwards into the classroom. The tables and chairs had been pushed to the side of the room and Marlene was sat crosslegged on the teacher’s desk; Sirius saw her roll her eyes when she watched them stumble in squabbling. She’d make a good teacher for that eye roll alone. 

“Alright. Sorry for the recap Sirius, but you’ve had a head start.” She said, getting to her feet. “So the Patronus, in its corporeal form, is supposed to charge the Dementors away…in theory, I’ve never had to actually try it on a Dementor but that’s what the books say. You’re going to need to concentrate completely on one happy thought or memory, the happiest you have, it needs to be so clear that you can see it inside your head—”

“Pete’s will be that time Nancy Andrews accidentally tripped into him.” James laughed, and Peter shot him a sour look.

“And the incantation is —” Marlene said, still biting back a smirk as she spoke, “ _expecto patronum!_ ” A beautiful, silvery lioness shot out of the end of her wand, it sprang right past them, charging to the end of the classroom before turning back and approaching slowly. Sirius reached out his hand to touch it, but no sooner had is fingers made contact, it dissolved. James gave her a whooping cheer. “You ready to give it a try?”

Sirius closed his eyes for a moment, this had been his problem last time. He hadn’t been able to think of anything happy enough…nothing in his childhood would qualify. He’d been thinking all over Christmas and he was sure he had it: the moment he’d been sorted in to Gryffindor. It felt like confirmation that he was different from his family. That he didn’t have to accept and emulate their cruelty and vitriol; there was a place and a family to which he really belonged. It did the trick, and after twenty minutes he’d succeeded in getting a large dog to erupt from the tip of his wand, the same form he took as an Animagus. The smile on Marlene’s face as she looked at him made his breath catch in his throat. If he could spend the rest of his life looking at that smile he would die a happy man. His joy didn’t last however, not long later a wolf shot from Remus’s wand and Sirius watched, horror struck, as realisation dawned on Marlene’s face. Sirius was quite sure that she had pieced together Remus’s monthly absences and the form of his Patronus. Surely she wouldn’t tell anyone…Remus was her friend. Part of him wanted to beg her to keep it to herself but he didn’t dare mention it. What if he’d misread the whole situation and she _hadn’t_ figured it out? It would be just his fucking luck to go and tell her in the process of asking her to keep it to herself. 

“I think we should call it a night.” James muttered rubbing the back of his neck.

“I…yeah.” Marlene murmured, still looking at Remus. “Yeah, you’re right.” James held the classroom door open for them and they filed out.

“Listen, Marley…” Sirius began but Remus shook his head quickly. “Thanks for that, you’re a good teacher.”

“You’re all putting a bit too much faith in me. I’ve never tried to conjure one when faced with an actual Dementor—”

“Wow McKinnon, everyone says that you’ve shagged all four of them, but at the same time? A Valentine’s Day special was it?” Sirius turned, two fourth year Ravenclaw girls were stood on the stairs to their left, watching them. He recognised the one who spoken, he'd snogged her behind the greenhouses in the first week of the school year. Christy, or Cathy…something like that. Sirius was just about to jinx them when Remus docked ten points.

“For what?” The cow snapped coldly.

“Being a bitch?” James supplied. Marlene laughed but Sirius didn’t miss the hollowness of it. He couldn’t understand the nastiness that seemed to be directed at her. As far as he could tell it was completely unwarranted. She was pretty, smart, and funny. Excellent at Quidditch and popular — at least among her fellow Gryffindors…yet people whispered about her behind their hands or, in the case of some particularly brave students, insulted her right to her face.


	20. XXVII

“You’re being so good not waking Mummy up.” Sirius cooed, kissing Minerva’s tiny hand. “And especially good not waking up your nasty grandmother’s nasty portrait. We’ll find a way to take it down, won’t we sweetheart? It can be our little project.” Something in the back of his mind registered that this was all amiss, when had they moved into Grimmauld Place? He tried to think back but he couldn’t remember…he couldn’t even remember Minerva being born. He lit the stove but it, along with the lamps in the room, flickered and went out. A chilling cold pierced his heart, it seemed to freeze the air in his lungs. Minerva started to cry. He spun around and, illuminated from the light on the landing above, he could make out Barty Crouch flanked by two Dementors. “How did you get in here?” 

“Mr Black, we’ve come to take the child to Azkaban.” Crouch said.

“What the fuck did you just say?” Take a fucking baby to Azkaban? _This was just a dream,_ he told himself. _He was asleep in bed next to Marlene, and in a minute he was going to wake up._

“You and James Potter broke the law when you became Animagi, Dementors have also been despatched to the Potter residence to collect his son.” Crouch said with a confidence that didn’t match how insane this sounded. 

“I don’t understand, that’s not the punishment for…well, anything.” 

“Are you expert in wizarding law?” Crouch asked.

“No, but apparently in this room I’m the expert in common sense.” Sirius muttered, stepping back and holding Minerva tighter.

“Take the child.” He said to the Dementor on his left. A pale, scabbed hand protruded from its cloak as it advanced on them. Sirius concentrated hard on the moment Marlene had agreed to marry him, the soft laugh as she told him that she fucking hated him, in that _way_ that was so full of love. 

“ _Expecto patronum!_ ” Silver vapour burst from the end of his wand and faded to nothingness in seconds. Sirius hadn’t produced a Patronus so feeble in years. Where was his usual large dog to charge them away? 

“ _Expelliarmus._ ” Crouch said lazily and Sirius’s wand flew from his hand. The Dementor grabbed Minerva, its cold, glistening hand closing around her little arm as it ripped her from Sirius’s grasp. She fell at its side like a rag doll.

“Stop, you’re going to hurt her! You’ve got to support her head! Marlene! Marlene!”

“Sirius, wake up!” Sirius’s eyes flew open. Marlene was kneeling over him, shaking his shoulders. She pushed his hair out of his eyes and helped him sit up against the pillows. 

“We’d already moved into Grimmauld Place and Dementors came to take Minerva to Azkaban.” He said, it sounded even more stupid now that he was awake. 

“They’re a little early.” She grinned dryly, and pulled his shirt off over his head. It was drenched with cold sweat. The corners of her mouth kept twitching up and she bit down on her lip. He was sure that she was desperately trying not to laugh at him.

“She’d already been born.” He explained pathetically.

“I figured. I know you’re scared about the hearing, but it’s going to be okay. You were kids when you became Animagi, and you’ve done so much good since we left school. It’s going to be a fine at the most. They won’t send you to Azkaban, I’m not going to let them.” She she said softly. “Here.” She took his hand and placed it on her bump. “She’s been kicking like mad. Probably concerned that her Dad was flailing around and shouting like a crazy person. Do you want me to get you some water.” 

Sirius shook his head, letting the movement beneath Marlene’s skin soothe him.


	21. XXVIII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> April 1976

Sirius knocked on McGonagall’s office door, it was strange to be summoned here when he wasn’t in trouble. 

“Take a seat, Black.” She said, spreading career leaflets out on her desk. “You’re here to discuss any future career plans you might have, I’ll be able to advise you on which subjects to carry forwards to N.E.W.T Level. Have you considered what you might want to do after you finish school?” She didn’t sound hopeful when she asked this. 

Sirius hesitated, he’d been thinking about this a lot since the notice about careers advice had gone up in the common room. He’d never really thought about his life beyond Hogwarts, it was his favourite place in the world, he didn’t ever want to leave. James had pointed out how cool a career as a Curse-Breaker sounded, and he had a point, it would certainly be exciting. And yet, when he was drifting off to sleep the previous few nights, there was one career idea that kept selling itself to him. 

“I’m actually waiting for you to retire to take over the Transfiguration post.” He said with a slight grin. McGonagall opened her mouth and closed it again. She actually gave him a smile. 

“How old do you think I am, Black?” Sirius bit down hard on his tongue to keep himself from saying ‘a thousand’. “I have no plans on retiring any time soon, so unless you intend to survive on your family’s money, I think you should think about other avenues.” He highly doubted his parents would support him much longer, that was the luxury of the Reguluses of the family. “If your heart is set on teaching Transfiguration and you’re prepared to relocate, there are plenty of other wizarding schools in the world that you can contact about potential teaching posts.”

“I suppose.” Sirius said, thoughtfully. Part of the appeal though had been Hogwarts itself, it was his home. 

“You certainly have the required skill at Transfiguration, you have been top of the class in this subject every year that you’ve been here and you are on track to receive and Outstanding in your O.W.L; in fact, you have continually demonstrated ability far beyond your years. However—”

“There was always going to be a ‘but’, wasn’t there?” He asked. 

“Teaching is an incredible responsibility...a quality that you have frequently shown to lack.” McGonagall’s voice was harsh, but the corner of her mouth twitched. She wasn’t telling him off. “Have a think about what I’ve said, and we can arrange another meeting next week to see if you want to consider other options just in case you are unable to find a teaching post.” She said. Sirius got to his feet, he was just about close the office door behind him when she spoke again. “I think you have the potential to be an excellent teacher.”


	22. XXIX

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> April 1976

Marlene was sat on the floor by the common room fire, trying to memorise the formula for Cross-Species Switching. She could perform the spell…just about, but that wasn’t going to help her in the theory exam come June. 

“Have you had your careers meeting yet?” Lily asked Remus, as she attempted to vanish the kitten that was cleaning itself on the coffee table. 

“Yeah, McGonagall gave me loads of information. I’m just not sure how much of it is going to be helpful.” He muttered. “I don’t know what I want to do.” He added quickly, looking rather miserable about the whole prospect. She supposed that if it ever came out that he was a werewolf, it wouldn’t be easy for him to get a job. She hadn’t told Remus that she knew, nor had she told anyone else. A very small part of her wasn’t sure if that was the right decision, but in the odd moments when this little voice spoke up, the rational part of her mind reasoned that it was very likely that the teachers were already aware. Anyway, she _knew_ Remus. He had such a kind heart, this didn’t change who he was. 

“Where are the Lost Boys when you need them?” Lily groaned when the kitten jumped into her lap and curled up. She picked it up and put it back on the table.

“The Lost Boys?” Marlene asked. She figured that she was talking about Sirius and James, but she felt like she was missing a reference.

“Peter Pan.” Remus said, looking up as the portrait hole opened. “Speak of the devils.” 

“Ah good, Sirius. I need you, I can’t get the kitten to disappear.” Lily said, attempting the spell for him. The kitten simply looked up at her and gave a rather adorable meow.

“I told you, Lils.” Marlene grinned, reaching forward to give it a scratch behind the ear. “It’s because you don’t _want_ the kitten to disappear.” 

“I promise, if you make it disappear, I will bring it right back.” Sirius laughed. “Now, you’re not moving your wrist with enough determination, it’s a bigger mammal, so if you just—”

“I’ve got this.” James said, crossing the room and taking gentle hold of her wrist. Sirius rolled his eyes and flopped down into his arm chair. James demonstrated the resolve she was supposed to use, and to his credit, when Lily tried the spell again, the kitten did vanish. 

“Thanks.” She muttered irritably, but James's face lit up as though she’d declared her undying love for him. Sirius held out his hand, and with a wave of his wand, the kitten appeared on his palm. 

“As promised.” He said, handing it back to Lily.

“Is it the same one?” She asked.

“Of course.” Though Marlene wasn’t sure if he was telling the truth, she thought the kitten looked slightly less ginger than when it had vanished. Maybe it was just the light.


	23. XXX

The Muggle pub was loud and busy, it seemed there was a football match on nearby, and the supporters had all converged here beforehand. Sirius watched them, taking a drink from his pint glass. It was strange, they had no idea that there was a war going on around them, the threat that they were under. Maybe ignorance really was bliss.

“Its an odd sport isn’t it?” He asked Remus, still watching the fans.

“And our sport isn’t?” Remus laughed. 

“I suppose you’re right. Listen, Moony.” He said. “If they send me to Az—”

“They won’t.” Remus said quickly, with as much infuriating confidence as Marlene had been demonstrating. It was encouraging, supportive, but not practical.

“I need you to hear me, Remus.” He snapped. “Marlene isn’t going to move back in with her parents. I tried suggesting it and she took my head off. She’s always been too stubborn to ask anyone for help, even when she really needs it. _If_ they put me in prison, I don’t know how long it will be for. I might be in there when she has the baby.” His voice caught, the idea was too unbearable. “I don’t want her to be alone. I need you to keep an eye on her, she won’t call you, she won’t call anyone.”

“It won’t come to that—”

“Remus.” He hissed through gritted teeth. He sighed and drained his glass. “I am amazed by Marlene every single day, she seems to be able to do anything she sets her mind to through sheer force of will…but if something goes wrong and she’s alone…I need them to be alright— that place will be hell enough without me worrying about Marley too.” 

“Alright, of course. Of course I’ll keep an eye on her.” Remus said. “But, she’s going to be livid when she finds out you’ve basically asked me to spy on her.” He added. “You might be best off asking the Dementors if you can stay a couple of extra nights.”

“Oi, I thought you said I won’t end up in there?” He challenged, but Remus was smiling. Sirius stood up and clapped him on the shoulder. “I best be off. Thanks though.” Remus wrapped a red and white scarf around his neck; it matched the Muggles’ in the pub.

Sirius stared at him. “So that’s why you suggested this place, you’re going to the match?”

“Lily got me into it. Different team of course, she’s a Midlands girl who only has eyes for Aston Villa, but it turns out that Manchester United are actually quite good.” Remus grinned.

“I literally have no idea what you just said.” 

Sirius left the pub and skirted round to the back, double checked to make sure no one was around, and apparated to Hogsmeade. He pushed open the door to the Three Broomsticks, and spotted Marlene and Nicole at one of the tables by the window. He went over to the bar and nodded at Rosmerta.

“Sirius Black, as I live and breathe.” She said, leaning over the bar to give him a hug. “I wondered if I’d be seeing you when your Marlene walked in. What can I get for you, love?” 

“A Mulled Mead, a Pumpkin Juice, and a Butterbeer, please.” 

“Go sit down, I’ll bring them over.” She said, but he shook his head. 

“Don’t be daft, you’re rushed off your feet.”

She smiled gratefully and prepared the drinks. “Still turning heads, I see.” She nodded at a table of Hogwarts girls by the bar were staring at him with considerable interest. 

He placed a galleon on the bar and laughed. “You know I’ve only got eyes for you, Ros. Keep the change.” Picking up the drinks he weaved through the pub to Marlene and Nicole and set their drinks on the table. 

“Hi Sirius.” Nicole beamed. She blushed scarlet when Sirius kissed her cheek, and he caught Marlene rolling her eyes. 

“Do you want the mead or the Butterbeer?” Sirius asked, handing Marlene the Pumpkin Juice.

“The mead, obviously.” Nicole said, delightedly.

“Just don’t let your teachers see.” Marlene said, inclining her head towards a near by table of Hogwarts staff.

“Your sister is still scared of McGonagall. How’s school going, you’re causing lots of trouble I hope? James and I didn’t choose our mischief successor lightly.”

“I charmed the first years caldrons so they’d spurt potion like those musical fountain displays.” She grinned. 

Sirius let out a snort of laughter and tapped his bottle against her goblet. “Attagirl.”

“Nicki.” Marlene said reproachfully, but he could hear the smile underneath her concern. Nicole reached into a bag on the floor and pulled out a little stuffed lion. She’d tied a big red bow around its neck.

“I bought this for the baby.”

“That’s really nice of you, Nic. Thanks.” Marlene said. Sirius thought it was fitting, any child that came from Marlene was sure to be fierce and lionhearted.

“Are you going to be there when it’s born?” She asked Sirius. “I was chatting to Mum and Dad, and Dad said that he wasn’t there when she had Jeremy, Marlene or me. He said it wouldn’t have been proper for him to see our Mum like that. He went down the pub instead. It doesn’t seem right, though.”

“I’ll be right there to hold your sister’s hand, you don’t need to worry about her. I’d like to see anyone try and keep me away.” He said, the idea of leaving Marlene while she was such pain was repellant, though his heart tugged at the thought of the looming hearing.

Marlene reached over and quickly swapped the two drinks around. “McGonagall’s coming.” She hissed and Sirius gave Nicole a quick wink.

“Sirius, can I have a word?” McGonagall asked.

“Are you going to give me detention?” He asked innocently. She pressed her lips into a thin line, as though seriously considering it. McGonagall didn’t seem in the mood for jokes, so he got to his feet and followed her into one of the rooms behind the bar. 

“Sit down.” She ordered and, feeling very much like a teenager again, he did as he was told. 

“Am I in trouble?” He bit the inside of his mouth to keep from smiling when her nostrils flared.

“An Animagus, Black? Of all the reckless, stupid, dangerous— Dumbledore told me, the Ministry have called you before a hearing!” She added. “And don’t you worry, as soon as the holidays start I’ll be visiting Potter to give him the same talking to. In your fifth year as well!”

“Well, we succeeded in our fifth year, we started the process at thirteen.” He clarified. 

“How could you be so…”

“Reckless, stupid, and dangerous? It’s a gift.” He grinned, unable to stop himself this time.

“It’s going to be transcribed on your tombstone if you’re not careful. I don’t think I have ever been so disappointed.” However, she didn’t _look_ disappointed. McGonagall had been disappointed in him before and this wasn’t the same. Angry, sure, but not disappointed.

“Except you’re not…” He said slowly, sure he was about to push his luck. “You might _want_ to be disappointed, but you’re proud, right?” 

“Don’t be so ridiculous.” She snapped, but she was smiling. “You succeeded two years earlier than I did…and I had help.” Finally, she added. “I don’t think I’ve ever been so proud in my life. The skill that you and Mr Potter have demonstrated is outstanding and while I am furious that you let young Mr Pettigrew—” her nostrils flared again as she said his name, “attempt such a dangerous feat, that you didn’t come to me, and that you _broke the law and risked your safety so thoroughly_ …I am incredibly proud. I’m going to write a letter to the Ministry, vouching for you.” 

Sirius smiled up at her, more grateful than he could ever say.


	24. XXXI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> June 1976

Marlene was sat on the floor, painting Lily’s toe nails as she dangled her feet off the edge of the bed, while Lily quizzed her from her potions book. “Keep your legs still.” She muttered. The kitten — which Lily had called Gary, for reasons passing understanding — purred from where it was curled up on her stomach. 

“Name the ingredients of Polyjuice potion.”

“Fluxweed, knotgrass, lacewing flies, leeches, Horn of Bicorn and Boomslang skin.” Marlene said confidently. Maybe she wouldn’t do as bad in Potions as she was expecting.

“You’re missing one.” Lily said. Marlene frowned, going back over them again in her head.

“No I’m not.” She said. Lily propped herself up on her elbows, letting the book fall onto her chest. Gary jumped up and shot under the bed. “I said keep still. You’re going to end up with red nail varnish all over your toe.” She said, grabbing her ankle. “What am I missing?” 

“How about the piece of the person you’re turning into? Pretty important part, Marls.” Lily laughed.

“Oh shit, yeah.” Marlene grinned. There was a loud crack from down in the common room and they looked at each other. She was willing to bet her broomstick on the identities of the students who had caused the commotion. “Shouldn’t you go and investigate…like a responsible prefect?” She asked, in mock concern.

“I have neither the time or energy to get into an argument with James Potter and Sirius Black right now. I don’t understand why you’re friends with them. Potter especially.” She said irritably. “I would like to hope, that if it's anything too serious, Remus will sort it out.” Marlene was sure that Remus wasn’t going to intervene in any of James and Sirius’s shenanigans…he was probably involved himself. 

“I don’t understand why you’re friends with Snape.” She challenged. “I know James is arrogant, and he can be a bit mean sometimes…but he’s so gentle. I know you’ve seen that side of him.” Marlene had to defend him, after all, James would defend her in a heartbeat. “If you have such a problem with James and Sirius, then why the hell did you suggest I ask Sirius out?” Lily opened her mouth and closed it again, possibly trying to think on a comeback.

“Remember when Flitwick paired me up with him in Charms back in November?” Lily finally asked. “All he did for those three hours was talk about you. But he didn’t talk about you the way other guys here talk about you — I mean they’re right, you _are_ gorgeous and your legs _are_ like a hundred miles long...not that they phrase it quite so politely — but all Black was talking about was how smart and funny you are. He clearly likes you and he definitely respects you—”

“He’s hardly been shy about going after a girl he likes, and yet…plus, he’d probably get bored and start kissing other girls in the broomsheds after a couple of weeks. For all his qualities, and he has a lot of them, he hardly strikes me as the one girl sort of boy.” Marlene shrugged, she wasn’t sure if she _really_ believed that, but she also wasn’t sure if she wanted to risk it. Though, he had sent her that photograph…incredibly romantic whether he’d intended it to be or not. Maybe when their exams were over — she hardly had time for anything but revision right now. “Get back to the questions, you said you’d help me revise.”


	25. XXXII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> June 1976

“Dare I ask how you did?” Lily asked, linking arms with Marlene as she and Mary caught up with her. Marlene bit back a grin, she was confident that she’d gotten an 'Outstanding' O.W.L. 

“I don’t want to brag—”

“Liar.” Mary accused, playfully. “You’ve been top of the class in every Defence Against the Dark Arts exam since we started here.” 

Mary had said it not her, that counted for something right? Marlene pulled her hair out its bun and smirked at them. “Let’s go sit outside.”

“I noticed Jackie Dobbs was drooling over Black, but it wasn’t her that _he_ was looking at.” Mary grinned, waggling her eyebrows.

“You’re as bad as Lily.” Marlene muttered, looking down to hide her small smile, she’d noticed too. They crossed down to the lake, it was so warm today that she half tempted to strip down to her underwear and jump in. People were already talking about her, so why not just give them something else to whisper about. The three girls took off their shoes and socks and dipped their feet in the cool water. Marlene spotted Sirius sitting under a beech tree with James, Remus and Peter; he winked at her and she grinned back. James had stolen a Snitch (Madam Hooch was going to be out for blood when she realised her office and been broken into); they watched him let it loose only to dive forwards and catch it moments later. Every time he did he messed up his hair and glanced over at Lily.

“He’s an absolute wanker.” Lily muttered after five minutes of this. 

“Yeah, he really is.” Marlene laughed fondly. 

“Fucking hell, Marley. If you crawled any further up Potter’s arse you’d be able to brush his teeth for him.” Lily snapped. Marlene snorted.

“I’m not going to even think of a comeback to that.” She grinned. “No because you’re right, but because that was actually very good. Vivid.” 

“We should be revising for Transfiguration tomorrow.” Lily said, rolling onto her front and resting her head on her arms. 

“In an hour, we’ve just finished an exam, we deserve a little break.” Marlene said, lying back in the grass. She propped herself up on her elbows, however, when she heard James call out to Snape and disarm him. She might have felt sorry for Snape, but any sympathy for him was dulled by the twinges of pain that still danced down her back. Even as James and Sirius approached him James kept looking over in their direction. Honestly, at this point, Marlene wasn’t even sure if James was hoping that Lily was watching him or that she wasn’t. Lily pushed herself up and hurried around the edge of the lake, shouting at them to leave Snape be.

“Should we help?” Mary asked, uncertainly. 

“I’m not, Lily’ll be livid if I hex Snape too.” Marlene muttered, knowing full well that hadn’t been what Mary had meant. “Oh Jamie.” Marlene sighed, when he said he’d leave Snape alone if she went out with him. That was never going to work, sometimes he was such a fucking prat. When Snape caught James in the face with a curse however, prat or not, Marlene’s wand was in her hand before she even registered reaching for it. She got to her feet but Snape was hanging upside down in the air. When he called Lily a Mudblood, though, Marlene set off around the edge of the lake, rage bubbling in the pit of her stomach. _How dare he._ After everything Lily did to stick up for that greasy, ungrateful little prick. Lily flung out her arm to stop Marlene’s advance as she shouted at James. She turned on her heel and stormed away, tugging Marlene with her as she went. 

Lily barely said a word for the rest of the day, and when James and Sirius returned to the common room that night she disappeared through the door to the girls dormitories and didn’t come back down. Marlene crept up behind Sirius’s armchair and covered his eyes.

“Guess who?” She asked, cursing herself, this was so fucking childish.

“Someone who just got an 'O' in Defence Against the Dark Arts?” She could feel the grin in his cheeks.

“You know it.” She’d been about to call him ‘babe’ managed to stop herself just in time.

“I think I probably did too.” He said confidently. “Thanks to you.” 

“So James, did you take off Snivelly’s pants?” She asked, the cut on his cheek had been healed now.

“Hey, Marlene? Howard Mason said you produced a Patronus in your Defence Against the Dark Arts practical. Like an actual Patronus?” Ana called over to her before he could answer. 

“Yeah.” Marlene shrugged, in a ‘no big deal’ sort of way. She turned at the sound of a snort. 

“Bullshit. I asked her to prove she could make one and she can’t. Patronus lessons are just what she calls spreading her legs for every guy in school.” Craig muttered. Marlene pressed down very hard on Sirius’s shoulder to keep him in his seat and shot a warning look at James. Taking her wand from her robes she imagined Craig’s embarrassment when she proved him wrong. 

“ _Expecto patronum!_ ” She called, not taking her eyes off of him. The lioness shot from her wand and charged a circle around the common room to cheers and applause, before dissolving. Craig had turned scarlet, from rage or embarrassment though, Marlene wasn’t sure. Maybe both. He got up and slowly closed the distance between them. Marlene realised what he was about to do a second too late; and he struck her hard across the face. She didn’t think the Gryffindor common room had ever been so silent. Blood was pounding in her ears, she didn’t even remember choosing a spell but he was stumbling backwards, clawing at his face and neck as his tongue began to swell. “I’d get to the Hospital Wing before you suffocate.” She said coldly. Panicked, Craig bolted out of the portrait hole. The common room remained eerily quiet. 

“Marley…” Sirius whispered, but she ignored him. On her way to the girls dormitory James squeezed her hand for a moment. Once upstairs she leaned back against the door breathing as hard as if she'd just ran a few laps of the Quidditch pitch. Lily was sat on her bed, her Transfiguration book open in her lap, but Gary was lounging across the pages. She clearly had as little desire for revision as Marlene did. 

“What’s up with you?” Lily asked as Marlene sat down on her bed, touching her cheek delicately. It stung. 

“It doesn’t matter.” She mumbled, reaching forward to scratch Gary behind the ears. The both looked up as the door opened again. 

“Lily.” Mary said, entering the room. “Snape is outside the common room. He said he’s going to sleep out there if you don’t go and talk to him.” 

Lily’s face was expressionless as she carefully moved the book to one side and got up, pulling on her dressing gown.

“Want me to come with you?” Marlene asked.

“No. This won’t take long.”


	26. XXXIII

Marlene climbed the stairs of Grimmauld Place, Sirius still hadn’t come home to the flat yet and she was concerned that he’d come here to stew over Monday’s hearing…it was easier not to panic herself when she was trying to reassure him. She followed the sound of his laughter as well as, rather confusingly, the squeals of a little girl. When she opened the door to the nursery he was spinning around, holding an eight-year-old over his shoulder as she tried to paint his back with the brush in her hand. Sheets covered the furniture and hung from one wall. 

“Marley.” He said, setting down the little girl and resting his hands on her shoulders. Both of them were covered in paint. “You remember Dora?” Andromeda’s daughter, of course. At least he’d found away to keep himself busy.

“You look very different from the last time I saw you.” Marlene grinned at her. 

“I’m a meta…a meta-fork…What’s it called again, Sirius?” She asked, looking up at him.

“A metamorphmagus.” He laughed, catching Marlene’s eye. A ‘meta-fork,’ they would definitely tease her about that when she got older. “The nursery’s ready, let me clear all this stuff out.” He said, picking the paint tray off the floor. He was about to hand it to Dora but seemed to think better of it. He waved his wand and it, along with the sheets, vanished. “Dora, do not sit down on anything.” 

“It’s beautiful.” Marlene breathed. A red velvet chaise-longue sat under the window, and there was an ornate rocking chair in the corner by the door. The wall that the sheet had been hiding was covered in tiny little gold stars, that sparkled as the light caught them, and lions pounced their way along the middle of the other three. He had already placed the little stuffed lion in the crib, and when Marlene opened one of the dresser draws she saw that he’d even started to put away the baby clothes. He was nesting. “I hope you’re not too disappointed if she’s not in Gryffindor.” 

“I’ll disown her if she’s not.” Sirius grinned. He bent down and lifted Dora over his shoulder again. “Let’s get you cleaned up, and I’ll take you back to your mum. Say bye to Marley.”

“Bye to Marley.” Dora giggled. 

Sirius returned half an hour later, paint and child free. Marlene had moved to the parlour and started sorting through the draws in the bureau. Most of it was completely harmless, quills, ink bottles, parchment, the like. But one draw was full of old photographs.

“Dora has asked if she can stay over sometime.” Sirius said, leaning against the door frame. “I said she was welcome to, I hope that’s alright?” Marlene patted the sofa next to her, and he sat down, pulling her legs over his lap.

“It’s fine, she’s your family. Plus, I like seeing you with kids, you’re really good with them.” She smiled, rubbing the back of his neck. Probably because there was part of him that was still just a big kid himself. That was one of the things that scared her the most about the possibility of him going to Azkaban. Even if only for a short time. She was worried that it would rob him of everything that made him so uniquely _her_ Sirius. There was an underlying melancholy to him that she was sure the Dementors would drag right to the surface; that awful sadness that he was usually able to stamp down with his innate cheerfulness. Marlene knew that a Sirius that came out of Azkaban would not be the same man that went in.

“Andromeda’s pretty much the only member of my family that I like. Growing up, I completely idolised her.” He laughed. “You know, she gave me my first fag when I was twelve? And my first taste of Firewhisky.” 

“An excellent role model then? Speaking of cigarettes, what’s the point of a cigarette case that burns you if you pick it up?” She asked, remembering the one they’d thrown out.

“It was my father’s. It didn’t burn him, of course, but he wanted to find out if it was me or Regulus who was nicking his fags.” Slightly horrified, Marlene grabbed his hand and turned it over. She ran her finger over the slight burn scar on his palm, she’d never even thought to ask him how he’d gotten it. “Don’t look at me like that. It’s pretty mild as far as my parents go.” 

“Sirius.” She sighed, leaning forward and placing a kiss on his shoulder. Marlene was also sure that was the first time that he had mentioned Regulus’s name since he’d told her that he’d died…she supposed it couldn’t be easy for him. He reached across her and picked up the pile of photographs from the draw. 

“It’s me.” He said, the top photograph was of a very cute baby, with Sirius’s dark hair and light eyes, smiling sweetly and kicking his legs around. Marlene smiled, it wouldn’t be so bad if their child looked just like him. The next photograph shocked her, Sirius again, with what she assumed was the Black sisters. Andromeda seemed to be about seven and she was teaching a very angelic-looking five-year-old Narcissa a clapping game as they sat cross legged on the floor. Sirius could be no older than Harry, and he was being bounced on the hip of what must’ve been Bellatrix; she looked roughly nine. Sirius was giggling as she kissed his rosy cheek and little hand. It was jarring, this little girl was going to grow up to cause so much pain. And she’d loved Sirius, and Sirius had loved her. 

“I won’t think less of you if you want to keep it.” She said, for Sirius had gone very still.

“I don’t want to keep it. I don’t want photos of her in my house. She’s evil.” He snapped, she was sure that he was thinking about that night outside Reed’s house. “She’s not my family. You are.” Marlene didn’t say anything. It hadn’t escaped her notice that, banishment or not, Bellatrix still referred to Sirius as her cousin. 

Sirius did add any photographs of him and Andromeda to a ‘keep’ pile, including a funny one of her climbing up onto a kitchen counter to get a Chocolate Frog from a cupboard while Sirius waited patiently from the safety of the floor. Marlene didn’t recognise the kitchen, she figured it had to have been taken at his aunt and uncle’s house. Sirius spent a long time looking at a photo of Narcissa painting his nails bright pink, he was probably four. The the corner of the adult Sirius’s month twitched up in a slight smile and he added it for keeping. 

“She was the one who wrote to me to tell me that Regulus was dead. I’d not spoken to her in years — or since, for that matter — but she said that she thought that I should know. As far as my parents were concerned I no longer existed, so they never would have told me.” Sirius said quietly.

“They kept these photographs though.” Marlene had realised now that all of them were of Sirius.

“I doubt it was intentional, my mother probably forgot they were there.” He muttered.


	27. XXXIV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> July 1976

Sirius waited for Marlene outside the Regent’s Park underground station. It was sweltering hot; he’d thought the heatwave had been bad up north but the temperature there was nothing compared to London right now. He spotted her climbing the steps, her hair was in a messy bun, and she was wearing a crop top and very short high-waisted shorts. It took him by surprise for a second, he was so used to seeing her in her school robes. Realising that he was staring at her legs (they were so long!) he quickly caught her eye and waved to her over. She wrapped her arms around his neck in a hug. She smelled incredible; like sunshine. 

“Hi.” He grinned, stupidly. _Get a grip, Padfoot,_ he thought to himself. “Want to get an ice cream?” 

“Sure.” She smiled, pulling a bottle of sun cream out of her handbag. “But first put this on…I stopped in a Muggle shop on the way, I figured you wouldn’t have even thought about it. James never looks after his skin either.”

“I don’t need that stuff.” He shrugged, what was a bit of sun. 

“You’re such a guy. Humour me.” She said, forcing the bottle into his hand. Sighing, he sat back down on the bench and rubbed sun cream into the skin that wasn’t covered by his t-shirt and shorts. He supposed it was quite sweet that she was trying to take care of him. Once inside the park they stopped at an ice cream van; he bought them each a 99 and they sat on the grass under a willow tree to eat them. He took too big of a bite of his and scrunched his face up as the cold shot up to his forehead. Marlene laughed, licking ice cream off of her chocolate flake. 

“Rookie mistake.” She grinned. They watched people pass by in a comfortable silence; when they’d finished their ice creams he pulled her to her feet… and was pleasantly surprised when she didn’t let go of his hand. 

“I guess your Mum must be pretty busy at the moment?” Sirius asked, there had been a brief surge in Muggle deaths over the last fortnight, and Beatrice McKinnon and the rest of her department were having to get inventive, though that landslide in Hull and been an interesting story choice.

“I’ve only seen her once since I got home. Although she has managed to negotiate a pay rise because of all the extra work they’re having to do.” Marlene said, with a tone that clearly said that this didn’t make up for the absence of her mother. “Next week Lily is coming to stay for the rest of the summer, so it won’t just be me and Nicole all day. She’s said that she’s sick of Snape showing up on her doorstep everyday. She caught him looking though her bedroom window on her first night back. She has to wait until after her Dad’s birthday though.”

“What a fucking creep.” Sirius muttered, feeling exceptionally sorry for Lily. They past a considerable portion of time calling Snivellus every name under the sun. It didn’t escape his notice that from time to time the people they past would take a second glance at the still very angry red marks on Marlene’s back. He realised that to them it must look like she had been struck by lightning. _Fucking Snivellus._ If Marlene noticed though she didn’t care, or at least she was pretending not to.

By the time they’d looped the park twice and ended up back where they started, Sirius was starting to get hungry…not to mention thirsty. “Want to go for a drink?” He asked, nodding at the Muggle pub across the road. They crossed over and he caught sight of the barman though the window. “I think it might be better if you order the drinks.” Sirius said, the Muggle drinking age was eighteen, and Marlene was probably going to have a better chance of getting served than he was. He wasn't sure how any man could deny her something she ask for. 

“Go and sit down, if I have no luck then we’ll swap.” Marlene laughed, pushing open the door. Sirius sat at one of the outdoor tables and waited. Marlene returned not long later carrying a jug of Pimm’s, two glasses, two packets of crisps and a bowl of nuts on a tray. “I’ve ordered us some chips as well.” She said as Sirius poured out their drinks for them.

“Thanks.” 

“He was powerless against my charm.” She laughed.

“Yeah, I’m sure it was your charm that he couldn’t resist.”

It had gotten dark by the time they left the pub, Sirius had a warm sleepy feeling in his soul. Whether that was a from the day in the sun, the food and drink, or a combination of the two, he wasn’t sure. “I’ll take you home.”

“Don’t be daft. I live out in Wallington, I’ve got to get the underground and a train. It’s too far for you to go just to come back.” She said.

“Well, stay at mine then.” Sirius said, part of him was worried — not that she was someone who needed worrying about — for her travelling by herself at night, and part of him just wasn’t ready to say goodbye yet. “I’ll sneak you in.” 

Half an hour later they were climbing the stairs in Grimmauld Place. Sirius pressed his fingers to his lips as they past the drawing room where he could hear his parent’s voices. He was sure that she was trying not to giggle, though he couldn’t work out what she found so funny in this house of all places. 

“I love it.” She whispered, looking around Sirius’s very Gryffindor and very Muggle-loving bedroom.

“Good. My parents hate it.” He said delightedly. “You take the bed, I’ll sleep on the floor.” He didn’t particularly want to put her in one of the spare rooms with Kreacher wandering around…or worse, his mother. 

She rolled her eyes. “It’s a big bed, we can share. I trust you.” Sirius felt his heart swell. After all the shit guys threw at her, she had no reason to trust anyone, and yet she trusted him. “Can I borrow a t-shirt or something?” Sirius pulled one out of the draw and tossed it to her. As he changed into his pyjamas she turned her back to him, but he could see out of the corner of his eye as she took off her top and bra, pull his shirt on over her hand and shimmy out of her shorts. Marlene McKinnon would be the death of him. 

In the darkness it took him a long time to stop thinking about how close she was to him, and how little she was actually wearing. Her hair was down now and a lock of it was tickling his cheek. “Sirius?” She eventually asked, just as he was drifting off to sleep.

“Yeah?” He whispered, and then her lips were against his; she was kissing him, ever so softly at first before closing the distance between them completely. It was as though his whole world had come alight. He wasn’t sure anything in his life held a candle to this moment.


	28. XXXV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> July 1976

When Sirius woke he reached out for Marlene before he opened his eyes. He might have thought he’d dreamt that she’d come back here with him last night if he couldn’t smell her hair on the pillows. The bed beside him was empty; he sat up, looked around and saw her sitting on the window seat and reading.

“Morning.” He said, stretching his arms up above his head.

“Morning.” She put the book back in her handbag and crossed back to the bed, sitting beside his feet.

“You brought a book? Remus have you been at the Polyjuice?” He teased, taking gentle hold of her chin and moving her head slightly to each side. 

“Just incase you started to bore me.” She teased. “It’s a very good book. I borrowed it from Lily.”

“What’s it about?”

“About a handsome young man with a magic painting of himself that ages so he can stay young.” She explained. “Where’s your bathroom?” 

“There’s one though the next door along.” He said, watching her leave the room. Hopefully she wouldn’t run into Kreacher out on the landing, he was never a pleasant thing to see first thing in the morning. “Do you want any breakfast or anything?” He asked, when she returned, tucking his wand into the waistband of his pyjamas. 

“I could murder a cup of tea.” She said, pulling on her shorts. She took his hand as they headed downstairs and he couldn’t help but smile. _And_ , he thought, _it had been her that kissed him._

“Sirius!” His mother’s voice echoed from the dining room as they past the door. He cursed under his breath. She appeared in the doorway; she always seemed so much taller than she really was. “Where did you go yesterday?”

“Regent’s Park.” He said. “Kicked a football around with these Muggle boys I know.” He added. He was lying but he enjoyed watching the sparks shoot from her eyes. 

“You disgust me.” His mother spat. 

“It’s nothing to the disgust I feel for you.” He muttered, noticing her hand twitch, as though to reach for her wand. 

“Who are you?” She snapped turning her attentions sharply to Marlene, glancing at her hand still in his.

“Marlene McKinnon.” Marlene said. There was a dignity in the way that she said her name that Sirius had never really noticed before. He’d never had that sort of pride in his own name.

“Are you pure-blood?”

“I’m Muggle-born.” She said. Sirius resisted the urge to look round at her. He knew that she was lying, there were Muggles in her family — Sirius couldn’t remember if it was one of her sets of grandparents, or one of her sets of great-grandparents — but her parents were definitely both magical. Marlene knew what kind of person his mother was and she was deliberately antagonising her. Honestly, he didn’t think she’d ever been more attractive to him than she was right now. 

“Mudblood filth! Get out of my house!” His mother screeched, drawing her wand. Sirius pulled out his own and darted in front of Marlene, he should have warned her that she shouldn’t walk around this house without hers. His mother’s wand went off with a bang and he felt himself flying backwards, his head hitting the thin hallway table with a crack. Spots appeared in his vision and his eyes started to water. It took him several moments gather himself. His mother was screaming furious, deranged insults; Marlene must have moved out of the way just in time, as she was now standing wandless between them. Sirius shook his head, but regretted instantly. He used the table to pull himself to his feet and grabbed Marlene’s hand, pulling her back towards the stairs. He’d had enough. 

“You’re bleeding.” Marlene whispered, as he kicked his bedroom door closed behind them. Sirius touched the back of his head, wincing as it stung. His hair was damp. “I’m so sorry, that was my fault I was trying to piss her off.”

“It’s not your fault.” He muttered, opening his trunk and starting to toss things in at random. 

“What are you doing?” 

“Leaving, I’m done with their shit, I’m not having another summer like this. Now grab a bag and start packing it.” 

“Where will you go?” She asked pulling off his shirt and throwing it into the trunk. He looked up just in time to see her topless before she turned her back to change. Feeling slightly guilty, he crossed to the chest of draws and began to take out anything he might need. 

“I’ll stay with James for a few days, until I can figure something out.” He said, changing into jeans and a t-shirt and pulling on his trainers. 

“The Potters’ will keep you. That’s just who they are.” Marlene said fondly. He forgot, sometimes, that Marlene had known the Potter family her whole life, that her and James had been friends before they’d started school. Ten minutes later they were dragging his trunk and bags out of the front door while his mother screamed at them from the hall. Sirius threw out his right arm and a the Knight Bus came hurtling round the corner of Grimmauld Place. 

“One, Broad Lane, Yate.” He said, cutting off the conductor’s introduction. The quicker he got away from this house the better. He and Marlene heaved his trunk on and sat down. He felt immensely grateful that she was coming with him. She took some tissue from her handbag and pressed it against the back of his head. 

“Mrs Potter will heal it up in no time.” She said.

“It’s nothing.” He muttered, but he’d seen all the blood when he’d pulled his hand away.

“It’s not nothing.” He was sure he heard her voice catch when she said that. He felt awful, it had been stupid to suggest that she stay, he’d never wanted her to have to see that. 

They reached James’s house and Marlene asked the driver to wait for a couple of minutes while she helped him with his trunk as she needed to return to London. 

“What happened to you?” James asked when he answered the door. 

“His mother.” Marlene said sharply and James’s eyes flashed.

“It’s nothing.” Sirius said, but his head was throbbing a painful contradiction. “I’ve left, I need somewhere to stay for a few days.” He leant against the wall, feeling slightly lightheaded as Marlene and James carried his trunk and bags over the threshold. 

“I’ll see you soon.” Marlene said, kissing him softly. “Look after him.” She added to James. He watched her hurry back to the Knight Bus and despite the gushing head wound, he was sure that in that moment he could have produced the best Patronus of his life.


	29. XXXVI

Sirius awoke suddenly from another horrifying and ridiculous nightmare about the outcome of the hearing. This time Marlene had made a deal with Crouch to go to Azkaban in his place; Sirius had watched like an unseen ghost as she had given birth scared and alone in a cell. Their daughter had not been alive. He would have been better off not even trying to sleep, he certainly felt no less tired than he had last night, and now there was icy fear chilling his chest. It was six in the morning and when he rolled on to his side he realised Marlene wasn’t in bed. 

“She’ll be down stairs.” He said loudly into the darkness. Getting up, he walked slowly down the five flights to the kitchen, both because he was pushing open doors looking for Marlene as he went, and because he was worried that if he moved to quickly he would vomit over one of the bannisters. 

“How the—” He said when he pushed open the kitchen door. Lily was sat on the counter nursing a cup of tea in both hands while James tried to persuade a weepy Harry to eat some scrambled egg. They both looked exhausted. 

“Dumbledore returned my cloak. We used old Batty Bagshot’s fire.” James explained. 

“Don’t call her Batty.” Lily yawned. “We wanted to be here for moral support, Remus said he’ll come round for when you get back.”

 _If I get back_ , Sirius didn’t say. Marlene was already dressed, it was very odd seeing her in robes. They spent so much time in the Muggle world and they’d lived on Muggle streets and estates since they’d left school, it was just more practical to dress _as_ Muggles. 

“I bought you some new robes yesterday, the only pair I could find of your’s were a bit scruffy.” She said, pouring him a cup of tea. It would be even stranger wearing robes himself, even during the summers home from Hogwarts he’d worn Muggle clothes, not so much because of the location of Grimmauld Place, but because of how much it had angered his parents.

“Thanks.” He grunted. “You shouldn’t have come.” He said to James, though he was so happy to seem them. He reached forward and smoothed down Harry’s hair. “He feels a bit warm.” He added, placing a hand on his forehead and then his cheek.

“He’s got two more teeth coming through, I think that’s why.” James said, as Harry pushed his arm away with a screech of “No!”, sending scrambled egg flying across the floor. His whimpers turned into cries, and James sighed, eating the rest of the egg himself. “We’ve had this all night.” 

“Where did the chair come from?” Sirius asked, picking Harry up. “Oh Harry, you poor thing. It hurts, doesn’t it?” He cooed, rubbing his back.

“Kreacher found it in the attic and cleaned it up, he thought we might like it for when the baby’s a little older.” Marlene smiled. Sirius stared at her, it was remarkable how quickly Kreacher had come around on Marlene. He wasn’t quite as warm to Sirius. 

“You want me to take him while you have some breakfast?” Lily asked, setting down her tea.

“We’re okay, aren’t we kid?" He said to Harry, walking around the kitchen with him, he couldn’t face breakfast this morning anyway. 

“I thought we’d leave at eight. Be nice and early.” Marlene said to him, the plate of toast in front of her was untouched. She looked very pale, this amount of stress couldn’t be good for her right now.

“Are you alright?” He asked, she nodded but her smile didn’t look wholly real.

“There’s some carrot sticks in the fridge, you might have better luck with them.” She said. Sirius took them out, smiling despite himself. If his mother could see this very Muggle fridge in her house…Marlene had enchanted it of course, but it _looked_ very Muggle. He offered Harry a carrot stick and he took it, chewing on it as he drooled onto Sirius’s shoulder. He supposed the cold must be soothing against his gums. 

“Have you heard anything more about your hearing?” Sirius asked James and he nodded.

“Dumbledore has convinced Crouch to postpone it…until the outcome of yours.” He added, a little guilty. Sirius snorted. _Alright for some_ , though he hated himself instantly for thinking it…it wasn’t James’s fault things were so dangerous for the Potters right now, and he hated being shut away in the house.


	30. XXXVII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> September 1976

Marlene supposed that she, Lily, and Nicole must look quite a strange sight to the Muggles on the Victoria line, with a cat, an owl, and three trunks. It hadn’t been as bad on the train, they’d had the luggage racks, but the underground didn’t have that luxury. Once in Kings Cross station Nicole began to fret over getting on to the platform — it was as though she hadn’t been to see Jeremy and Marlene off every year — and Lily kindly answered all of her questions. It completely ruined Marlene’s idea to tell her that the train now left from platform three and a half and watch her run headlong into a brick wall. 

“And you wonder why you were never made a prefect?” Lily muttered as she recounted this plan while they followed Nicole onto the platform. “It would be just our luck for them to have opened the platform, she might’ve ended up on a train to France or something.” Marlene tried not to laugh at the idea, her parents would kill her.

Marlene spotted Sirius a little further down the platform with James and Mr and Mrs Potter. She smiled at him and he hurried over. “Your parents not here?” He asked, looking around. 

“No, they had to work.” She said, barely finishing the sentence before Sirius pulled her close and kissed her; one hand in her hair and the other on her lower back. She wondered whether he’d have waited until they’d got on the train if they had been there.

“You must be Nicole.” Sirius asked when Marlene had pulled away from him, and Nicole blushed scarlet and gave a small nod. She’d done nothing all summer but bombard Marlene with questions about him and now it was like she’d swallowed her tongue. “Do you want help putting your trunk on the train?”

“Yes please.” She whispered.

“Oi! James!” He called waving him over. James strolled over and gave Nicole’s plait a gentle tug. 

“Alright Nik Nak?” He asked. “Marley, Evans?”

“Hi James.” Nicole grinned as he and Sirius each took a side of her trunk and lifted it off the trolley, leading Nicole to the train. 

“Lily, please can I talk to you?” They both turned as Snape appeared behind them. 

“You should be fitted with a bell.” Marlene muttered. 

“Let’s catch Potter up, see what compartment he’s found for us all.” Lily said, ignoring Snape. 

“Don’t you have prefect duty? Marlene asked when they were out of earshot of him, and Lily just grinned. 

“If you get lonely you can come and sit with us, we’re just in the next carriage.” She heard Sirius say to Nicole as they past. Marlene rolled her eyes. He and James jumped off of the train and lifted Lily and Marlene’s trunks on for them. 

“I’ve never see you be so nice to a first year.” Marlene said, narrowing her eyes.

“Yeah, well, she’s your kid sister.” Sirius shrugged, flopping down onto the seat. 

Marlene looked at her watch, they still had five minutes yet. “I’m just going to say hello to the Potters.” She said, jumping down from the train and weaving her way back down the platform. When she returned James was waiting for her outside the door to their carriage. 

“Just so you know, I’ve warned Sirius that if he hurts you…” James punched his fist into the palm of his hand with a thwack. Marlene shoved him so hard and so suddenly that he stumbled back into an empty luggage trolley. “Marley! What the fuck was that for?”

“I don’t need you to protect me. You’re not my big brother, in fact I’ve got almost two months on you. I can take care of myself.” She said, holding out her hand to help him back up.

“Look, Marlene, you’re my sister.” He said in a matter-of-fact voice. “You’ve always been my sister, and you always will be my sister. I’m going to have your back, just like you’ve had mine.”


	31. XXXVIII

Marlene smoothed out the nonexistent creases on Sirius’s shoulders. “Are you ready?” She asked, he didn’t miss the slight shake in her voice. His mouth suddenly felt very dry. He nodded, squeezing her hand for a moment before pushing open the door to the courtroom. He led her inside and took a seat in the chair facing the rows of raised benches. He only counted thirteen people sat on them, he wasn’t sure if it worked in his favour or not that there were so few. He spotted Dumbledore seated in the back row, and his heart seemed to steady its rapid pounding by a small fraction. He also recognised the young woman to Crouch’s right, Amelia Bones, she’d been a couple of years above him at Hogwarts. She gave him a small wink…he tried to smile back but he was sure it was more of a grimace. 

“This is meant to be a closed hearing, if you wish to remain here then you must keep quiet and stand at the back.” Crouch said to Marlene in a cold voice. 

“Miss McKinnon is eight months pregnant.” Dumbledore said, waving his wand. Sirius turned to watch an arm chair materialise next to Marlene and she sat down in it. A sudden chill crept up his spine and he looked back at the door to see a Dementor glide into the room. His ears were ringing, and he was vaguely aware of Crouch speaking but his attention was so fixed on the Dementor that he couldn’t hear him. It was standing too close to him…and much to close to Marlene. 

“—please state your full name and address for the record.” Crouch said, and Sirius’s attention snapped back to him. 

“Sirius Orion Black, number twelve, Grimmauld Place, London.” He said.

“Mr Black, you are charged with knowingly violating paragraphs one through five of the Animagus Registration Act. How do you plead?”

“Guilty.” Sirius said, he thought he would choke on the word. He could hardly deny it now however, he’d already come forward and confessed.

“Do you have anything you wish to say in your defence before we make a sentencing decision?”

Sirius felt as though he had forgotten how to speak, his tongue felt suddenly too large for his mouth. He cleared his throat with a cough. “I know that what I did was wrong, but I didn’t do it intending to cause any harm. I discovered that someone I love is a werewolf, and the thought of him having to endure every full moon alone and miserable broke my heart. I could never keep him company as a human, but I would be safe to do so as an animal. I had to undertake the transformation in secret because the Ministry would never have allowed a thirteen-year-old to attempt it. I am deeply sorry for my actions.” He said, he wanted to add that he’d do it all again too but Marlene would kill him if he said that. 

“Mr Crouch. We have a testimonial here from Professor Minerva McGonagall.” Amelia Bones said, rifling through her papers and pulling out piece of parchment.

“Go ahead.” Crouch said. 

“ _During his seven years at school, Sirius Black failed meet a rule he didn’t consider worth breaking. He was arrogant, reckless, and defiant—_ ”

Sirius suppressed a groan, this hadn’t exactly been what he’d had in mind when McGonagall promised to write to the Ministry. 

“ _—and he was the single most gifted student that I have taught Transfiguration to in all my years at Hogwarts. From the age of eleven he demonstrated a skill in this subject that far surpassed what was expected of a child his age. Despite his tendency towards misbehaviour and disruption, he is bright, articulate, incredibly brave and deeply loyal. Since leaving school I know that he has worked tirelessly in the fight against He Who Must Not Be Named and his supporters, and to imprison him for any length of time for a crime that he committed while he was a child would be a monumental loss to the wizarding community. It has been a privilege to watch Sirius grow from a spirited little boy to an exceptionally noble young man. He has displayed, and continues to display, an extraordinary amount of courage and character, and I am deeply proud of everything that he has achieved._

_Sincerely,_

_Professor Minerva McGonagall_ ”

Sirius felt his eyes burning. 

“Taking into consideration the age which you committed the crime,” Crouch said, “and the testimony to your character. I am recommending three months in Azkaban.”

“You can’t!” He didn’t have to look around to know that Marlene had pushed herself to her feet. The intense wave of affection was marred with panic. 

“Silence, unless you wish to spend the night in Azkaban yourself!” He looked suddenly deranged. “All those in favour of the three month sentence, raise your hands.” Crouch said. Sirius watched and to his utter disbelief only Crouch and a squat young witch in bright pink cardigan did so.

“Might I suggest,” said Dumbledore, in that wonderfully calming voice, “a fine of one thousand Galleons.”

Crouch glowered at Dumbledore for a moment. “All those in favour?” The other eleven raised their hands, and relief washed over him. He could have fallen to his knees and wept. He would’ve paid a hell of a lot more than a thousand Galleons to stay out of Azkaban. Crouch strode past him, the courtroom door slamming against the stone wall as he left. 

“Amelia,” he grinned, “do you think I could get a copy of that letter?”


	32. XXXIX

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> November 1976

The speed with which Gryffindor Chasers were moving was like nothing that Sirius had seen before, spurred on by their win last year they were playing better than ever. Ana, Marlene, and James seemed to be passing the Quaffle so seamlessly that the Slytherin players had barely touched it all match; so far only scoring ten points to Gryffindor’s one hundred and twenty. Suddenly, Marlene’s broom gave a violent jerk upwards and she dropped the Quaffle. Sirius watched as James flew up beside her for a moment before speeding off. Clodagh Farrell and Luis Scott both dived after the Snitch, but Sirius wasn’t watching them, Marlene’s broom seemed out of her control, but no one else had realised. Both teams and spectators had turned to watch the two Seekers. Very reluctantly Sirius tore his eyes away from Marlene and scanned the crowd; Snivellus was also looking up at Marlene, half hidden by the crowd around him who had risen to their feet in a wave. Sirius reached down two rows and snatched a pair of binoculars from a third year.

“Shut up.” He snapped when the boy tried to protest. Sirius looked though them at Snape. He had his wand out and Sirius was sure that he was speaking. He barely registered the cheers as Clodagh secured Gryffindor’s win; Marlene was tumbling towards the ground, James speeding after her but there was no way he close enough to catch up. Sirius pushed his fellow Gryffindors out of his way as he charged down to the pitch. Marlene hit the ground and the stadium fell silent as abruptly as if some unseen force had switched off the sound. Her limbs we splayed out at odd angles. Sirius’s world began to spin as he vaulted over the barrier, he didn’t know how she could have possibly survived that sort of fall. James landed beside her, followed by the rest of the team, as people began to descend from the stands to get a closer look.

“Don’t touch her!” McGonagall screamed shrilly as James reached out his hand. She magicked her onto at stretcher and went up to the castle, the Gryffindor team following quickly behind them.

“I hope she’s alright.” Snape said, in a tone clearly indicating that he was hoping for precisely the opposite.

“You did this!” Sirius spat, spinning on the spot.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Snape said, his voice dripping with fake innocence. Sirius dived at him, roaring a mix of curses and expletives, but without a wand in his hand the spells had no effect. Not that it mattered, he didn’t need a wand to choke the life out of him. Remus and Peter grabbed his arms, holding him back; Snape gave a nasty little smirk and walked away. It took them a long time to half push and half drag Sirius back up to the castle as he fought to chase after Snape. It wasn’t until he reached the Entrance Hall that he realised that he was wasting time. He wrenched himself free and sprinted to the hospital wing, forcing his way through the Gryffindor team lining Marlene’s bed. Her eyes were closed, she might have been asleep if not for the trickle of blood staining her blonde hair.

“—out! All of you! It’s a miracle that she’s even alive!” Madam Pomfrey said, shooing away the rest of the team. Sirius didn’t move, neither did James. Nicole was sobbing uncontrollably into the front of his Quidditch robes and his grip on her was so firm that his knuckles were taught and white.

“Potter, take young Miss McKinnon up to my office and give her a very strong cup of tea.” McGonagall said, her voice fainter than Sirius had ever heard it. James nodded, though he seemed unwilling to look away from Marlene.

“Come on, Nik Nak.” He said softly. “Nicole, sweetheart. Let’s leave Madam Pomfrey to fix her up.” It took him a while to get Nicole to leave the hospital wing.

“It was Snape.” Sirius said abruptly, tearing his gaze away from Marlene to look at McGonagall.

“That’s a very serious accusation.” McGonagall said, her voice back to its usual briskness. Sirius wiped the hot tears off of his cheeks with his sleeve and grit his teeth defiantly.

“I saw him. He did something to her broom.” He hissed, reluctantly letting her guide him out into the corridor. He had no proof, but he wasn’t going to let Snape get away with it, he’d deal with the bastard himself if she wouldn’t believe him.

That night when everyone had gone to bed, Sirius took James’s cloak out of his trunk and crept downstairs.

“I’m coming with you.” Lily whispered, and Sirius let out a yelp, he hadn't noticed her sat in one of the chairs to his right. She didn’t need to ask if he was going to see Marlene. 

“Fine, just keep quiet.” Sirius muttered, throwing the invisibility cloak over them. They walked slowly and carefully to the hospital wing. Marlene had been changed into pyjamas and it appeared as though Madam Pomfrey had healed her broken bones. She still looked so fragile in the bed though, and the image of her falling though the air was burned into his mind. He wondered if she’d woken up at all since this afternoon. Lily went to take her hand but pulled back quickly, and honestly, Sirius couldn’t blame her. What if they did more damage? They sat down against the wall and Sirius made sure the cloak was covering them. “She’ll be okay won’t she?” 

“Of course she will.” Lily said, resting her head on his shoulder. “Madam Pomfrey can cure anything.” Sirius hoped that she was really as sure as she sounded.


	33. XL

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> December 1976

Madam Pomfrey had kept Marlene in the hospital wing for a week to be on the safe side, but she had emerged as good as new. That didn’t change the fact that Snape had gotten away with putting her there in the first place, the slimy bastard must have used someone else’s wand. Sirius had come up with the perfect payback though. He’d just had to wait for the next full moon. 

“Alright, Snivellus?” He called, pushing off from the Entrance Hall wall. Snape whipped around, drawing his wand. Sirius raised his hands. “Now, now. Don’t be like that.”

“What do you want?”

“You know, if you touch the knot in the tree with a long stick tonight, you’ll be able to see what’s down there.” He smiled. Snape’s eyes widened eagerly for a moment before he narrowed them.

“Why are you telling me this?” He asked suspiciously.

“Because you’re too much of a pathetic coward to actually try it.” Sirius shrugged, turning away and entering the Great Hall for dinner.

That night as Sirius crossed the grounds with James and Peter, he spotted Snape hurrying towards the Whomping Willow, and grabbed their arms to stop them. He was going to enjoy every moment of this. 

“What the fuck is that little prick doing?” James whispered, as the branches stilled and Snape disappeared.

“I told him how to get past the tree.” Sirius laughed.

“Have you lost your mind?” James shot out from under the cloak and sprinted after Snape. 

“What’s his problem?” Sirius muttered to Peter. Peter shifted uncomfortably before Sirius suddenly became visible. Fine, if the fucking wimp wanted to run back to the castle, then fine. “Oi! Prongs! Don’t be a twat!” He called as James shot down the passage. Sirius felt his heart hammer against his chest. This wasn’t going quite how he’d planned; James was going to get himself killed. Before Sirius could reach the tree himself James was dragging Snape back out, both of them gasping for breath. Snape gave them an enraged, terrified look before pushing himself to his feet and scurrying back to the castle. Sirius reached down and pulled James up off the ground, but the second he let go James swung his arm back and his fist collided hard with his jaw. Sirius stumbled backwards, rubbing the side of his face. “What the fuck was that for?” But James seemed too angry to speak. He turned on his heel and sped after Snape. “It was just a joke!” He yelled, following him. “He deserved it, anyway! He nearly killed Marlene!” 

They finally caught up to Snape in the Entrance Hall as McGonagall stormed down the marble staircase, white faced and furious, with Peter following quickly behind her. 

“Pettigrew get back up to bed. Black wait for me in my office. Snape, Potter, come with me.” She snarled. The look of cold fury on her face made Sirius’s stomach lurch. 

Sirius waited in her office for what felt like hours. He didn’t dare sit in her chair this time. When she eventually strode in, she crossed the room and looked down at him, her hands splayed out on the surface of her desk. He waited for the explosion, but it never came. He didn’t dare speak, he hardly dare even breath. 

“Explain yourself.” She said, her voice barely more than a deadly whisper. Sirius didn’t know what to say, he was beginning to think that this was possibly one of his more stupid ideas.

“I told Snivellus how to get past the willow.” He mumbled, his jaw throbbing painfully.

“Speak up.”

“I told Snape how to get past the Whomping Willow.” He said, a little louder. Her nostrils flared and he half expected her to breath fire. 

“I am aware. Why?” 

“Thought it would be funny.” He muttered, but this wasn’t the whole truth. “It’s no worse than what he did to Marlene!” 

“I can’t keep having this same conversation. You have no proof.” She seemed to deflate into her chair as she sat down. “I’m at a loss for what to do with you, Black. I should recommend to the Headmaster that you are expelled.” Sirius felt his stomach drop. “I would give you detention, but you’re in detention all the time and I no longer think they work on you. I would take points from Gryffindor, but you don’t seem to care about that either.” She sighed. “Do you have any idea of seriousness of what you’ve done? Two of your fellow students could have been killed tonight because of you, one of whom is your best friend, is he not? I have never been so disappointed with a student in my life. I expected so much more from you, Sirius. I thought that you were better than this.” Sirius looked at his knees feeling sick, he wished that she would shout at him. “Go to bed. I’m taking four hundred and sixty five points from Gryffindor.”

He was fairly sure that was all of their points, but he didn’t dare take a detour past the hour glasses to to confirm that Gryffindor’s was now empty. He would have taken expulsion over this level of disappointment from the adult he admired above all others. Why couldn’t he keep himself from being such a monumental let down to every parental figure in his life? But he would earn back her respect if it was the last thing he ever did.

If McGonagall had made him feel ashamed of himself, however, it was nothing compared to Remus. Sirius hadn’t gone down to breakfast, neither James nor Peter were speaking to him, but he had a free period afterwards anyway so at least he could wallow alone in the empty common room. The portrait hole opened and Remus stepped inside. He looked tired, and exceptionally grave. 

“Remus, I can explain.” He said quickly, jumping to his feet. 

“James told me what you did!”

“Remus—”

“You’re supposed to be my friend! How could you put me in that position? Do you think I want to hurt people? I am haunted by that fear every day!” His voice cracked and Sirius felt his stomach turn over. 

“Remus, I didn’t think—”

“You never do! You can be so careless with other people, Sirius. You insist you’re better than your family but sometimes you’re so much like them.” He spat. Sirius felt as though all the air had been knocked out of him. 

“Please, Moony…” He choked. 

“Just stay away from me.” He turned, slamming the portrait hole door behind him as he left.

Sirius sunk down into a chair and retched, but there was nothing to bring up.


	34. XLI

Marlene’s grip on the back of the kitchen chair tightened considerably from the pain. _Please, baby, not yet_ , she thought. She just couldn’t have the baby now, they still had too much to do. They weren’t ready, she wasn’t supposed to be due for a month. 

“Are you alright?” Sirius asked.

“I’m fine, my back just aches.” She lied. She had jobs for him and he’d never do any of them if she told him that was in labour and he definitely wouldn’t if she told him that her waters had already broken. “You need to go to the flat and pack up the last of those boxes and bring them here.” 

“I will, I will.” He said, sitting down a reaching for the teapot. Marlene grabbed it and pulled it out of his way. 

“You’ve been saying that for two days. I’m not playing anymore, you need to do it _now_. I can’t keep going back and forward like this.” She snapped. 

“Come on Marls, James and Lily were here, can you blame me for wanting to spend that time with them?” 

“Fine, I’ll do it.” She said, and he got to his feet quickly. She’d had a feeling that would work.

“I’m going, I’m going. Just go and lie down, okay?” He said, giving her a quick kiss on his way back up the stairs. 

It took Marlene a lot longer to reach the bedroom than usual; she hadn't trusted herself to apparate for several weeks now but today it felt like an especially bad idea. Maybe apparating so late into her pregnancy was the reason she'd gone into labour early. Sirius had warned her to stop, _why hadn't she fucking listened?_ Opening one of the boxes, she began to hang up their clothes. She let out a cry of pain and grabbed the wardrobe door to keep herself up right. This was ridiculous, Lily had said it had taken eighteen hours to have Harry, and Marlene was barely at eight. Though Lily had also said that contractions felt like period pain only worse and that was turning out to be massive understatement. She looked up at the sound of a crack as Kreacher appeared at her side.

“Miss Marlene, are you okay?” The elf asked. Marlene nodded, not trusting herself to speak just yet. She let out another cry, dropping to her knees. She was being stupid now, they were too close together. 

“Get Sirius.” She hissed through gritted teeth, and the elf disappeared with another crack. Minutes later she could hear Sirius thundering up the stairs, pushing open doors as he went, until he burst into the bedroom. 

“Marley!” He dropped down beside her and slowly helped her stand. 

“The baby’s early.” She said, his grip on her arms tightened considerably. 

“Let’s get you to a hospital.” His voice sounded hoarse with panic. She shook her head, she could hardly move, it was too late to go anywhere. “How long has this been going on?” He asked, helping her over to the bed.

“Since about five o’clock this morning.” She admitted, a little reluctantly. Sirius’s face fell, he looked furious. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He demanded. “Of all the stupid, reckless— Did you think that you could just cross your legs for a month and hope for the best? There are somethings that even you can’t control through stubbornness and force of will!”

“Do you think you could postpone yelling at me until I’m in less pain?” Marlene cried, but Sirius didn’t look guilty enough for her liking. 

“Let me take a look.” He muttered kneeling down at her feet and taking off her underwear. “Okay,” he said, if he’d sounded panicked before it was nothing to the look on his face now. “I can see her head. I’m going to be right back.”

“Please don’t leave me.” Marlene begged, she couldn’t do this by herself, she wasn’t sure she could do this at all. She was suddenly feeling every bit as young they really were.

“I’ll be as long as it takes me to apparate down to the kitchen and back. I promise.” He turned on the spot and disappeared. To his credit he was back in a matter of moments. 

“Where did you go?” She asked as he knelt back down by her feet. 

“To call for McGonagall. Are you ready to start pushing?” 

Marlene lifted herself up on her elbows, he was unbelievable. “Tell me you’re joking?”

“I’m not. I’ve got no idea what I’m doing, do you? Look this is your fucking fault, we wouldn’t be in this mess if you’d told me this morning what was going on!” He snapped. 

“My fault? We wouldn’t be in this mess if you hadn’t got in the shower with me eight months ago!” They grinned at one another.

“I hate you so much, McKinnon.” He said softly.

“I hate you too, Black.” At the next contraction Marlene started to push. She was going to kill Lily, she’d definitely understated how painful it was. The doorbell rang and the portrait of Sirius’s mother began to scream insults that echoed around the house. That had not been the first thing she had wanted her daughter to hear. McGonagall entered the room, shooing Sirius out of the way.

“Sit behind her so that she can lean against you.” She said. As annoyed as Marlene was at him for calling her, there was something immensely reassuring about having what felt like an actual adult around.


	35. XLII

Sirius cradled Minerva close to his chest, she was so much smaller than he had been expecting, though he really only had a newborn Harry to compare her to. But she was healthy, and more perfect than he ever could have hoped for.

“You gave us quite a scare.” He whispered, glancing at Marlene sleeping beside him. “Taking that long to cry.” In fact, it was the most terrified he’d ever been in his life, he was sure that his heart had actually stopped while he’d waited. Sirius stroked a finger gently over her soft dark hair as she gazed up at him with big, inquisitive eyes. “You’re so beautiful.” He couldn’t believe the depths to which he loved her, he hadn’t even known that he was capable of feeling like this. “I am going to make sure that you have a bright and wonderful life. I promise that I won’t let your childhood be as miserable as mine was.” He just had to make sure now that he lived for a very long time. Marlene had been right, there was nothing in the world that Minerva could do that would ever make him treat her like his parents had treated him. There was nothing she could do that would ever stop him loving her. “I’m sorry you have to be saddled with the name Black, I was rooting for McKinnon, but you’ll learn pretty quickly that your mother always gets what she wants.” He shot another glance at Marlene to make sure that she was still asleep. “Don’t tell her I said this, but you should try really hard to be just like your Mum. Brilliant and brave and loving…maybe not _quite_ so stubborn.” He swallowed down the lump in his throat. “You don’t want to take after me, I’ve done some pretty terrible stuff in my life. I’m going to be better though.” 

“How many times am I going to have to tell you that you’re a good man before you believe me.” Marlene mumbled into the pillow. 

“You’re supposed to be sleeping.” Sirius muttered. 

“And you’re supposed to be writing letters to my parents and our friends to tell them that we’ve had the baby.”

“I’ll do it when she next wants feeding.” He said. “I’m not ready to put her down just yet.”

“How’s she doing?” Marlene asked, rubbing one of Minerva’s tiny feet. 

“She’s perfect. Aren’t you, Sweetheart?” He said softly. He’d teased James a lot for going so soft after Harry’d been born, but he got it now.


	36. XLIII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> December 1976

“Just go and apologise to them.” Lily whispered to Sirius, handing Marlene back her corrected Potions homework. 

“I’ve tired.” Sirius muttered, looking longingly over at James and Remus in their usual armchairs. His heart ached with how much he missed them. This friendship that seemed to have sprung up with Lily had been an interesting surprise though. She couldn’t know the whole story he supposed, but she knew enough. Lily also seemed to be the only person who believed that Snape had tried to kill Marlene — except Marlene herself; he wasn’t even sure anymore if his friends believed it. However, he wasn’t feeling nearly as guilty about what he’d done to Snape…it was what he’d done to Remus that was causing him to lie awake at night — and how close he’d coming to getting James killed. 

“Fine, I’m going to bed. Have a good Christmas.” Lily said, picking Gary up off of her lap and crossing to the girls’ dormitory.

“Try again.” Marlene said, rubbing soothing circles into the back of his neck. Sirius pulled out of her reach, he felt too terrible to let her try and make him feel better. He wasn’t sure he even deserved to feel better. He knew that Marlene had pieced to together the whole story, the truth about Remus was an unspoken knowledge sitting between them. It wasn’t something they needed to discuss, if she’d been intending to tell anyone then she’d have done so by now. “They really miss you. James has said so…I don’t even think he’s actually angry anymore. Well, maybe a little bit, but mostly he just misses you.” 

Sirius watched as James got up and crossed the room to them. “You’ve not packed yet.” James said, putting his hands awkwardly in his pockets.

“What?” Sirius asked.

“You’ve not packed, we’re going home for Christmas tomorrow and you’ve still not packed anything.” James muttered. Sirius stared up at him, he’d imagined that after what he’d done a couple weeks ago he’d be spending Christmas alone at Hogwarts. “You told Mum and Dad that you were coming home for Christmas, they’re expecting you.” 

“Do you want me there?” Sirius asked, before he could stop himself. He wasn’t sure that he wanted to hear the answer if it was going to be ‘no.’ James didn’t say anything for a while, he seemed to be struggling for words. 

“‘Course I do.” He finally muttered, walking away to the dormitories before Sirius could say anything else.

“I’m going to bed as well.” Marlene said, giving him a soft kiss. “Try and get some sleep tonight, okay?”

Sirius knew that he needed to pack, but instead he shot over to the chair that James had just vacated. As soon as he sat down Remus went to get up, but they were alone in the common room now and he needed to make the most of it. He dived across the table and grabbed Remus’s wrists, keeping him in place.

“Please, Remus.” He begged, desperately.

“Let me go.” He was back to his quiet calm at least.

“Not until you listen to me. I’m so sorry. Snivellus tried to murder Marlene, I _know_ he did…and just…I wanted to hurt him. I wanted him to pay for it.” He stumbled. 

“You wanted him dead but you were too much of a coward to kill him yourself?” Remus asked coldly. “Let go.”

Sirius ground his teeth, but he wasn’t going to let Remus provoke him. “I’m not a killer.” 

“Neither am I, but you tried to turn me into one.” 

“I never meant to, I just didn’t think it that far through.” He said. 

“I trusted you, Sirius.” Remus muttered, he looked so betrayed; shame clawed at Sirius’s insides.

“Remus, I’m so sorry. Please.” He let go of him. He really hadn’t meant to hurt Remus like this or risk James’s life. Telling Snape how to get past the tree hadn’t been a spur of the moment decision by any means, but he really hadn’t thought about what that meant for his friend. “I’ll understand if you can’t forgive me, but I need you to know how sorry I am.” 

“I know you are.” Remus sighed. It didn’t exactly sound like he was forgiven but Sirius would take whatever he could get.


	37. XLIX

The doorbell rang and the portrait of Sirius’s mother began to scream her usual abuse; he’d forgotten to tell Marlene’s parents not to ring it. At least it hadn’t set Minerva off crying. 

“I’ll go.” Sirius said, getting up and hurrying downstairs. He opened the front door and the McKinnons jumped as they were confronted by the sound of the portrait, sharing worried looks. _Wonderful_ , they’d brought Jezza along.

“Don’t mind the shouting, it’s just my mother.” Sirius said, forcing a jovial voice and stepping to the side. “Marlene’s in the parlour, go straight up the stairs, I’m just going to sort the noise out…Kreacher!” Sirius followed them down the landing and looked into the portrait's taut and furious face. “Your granddaughter is beautiful, by the way.” He muttered to her. “I’m so glad she’ll never have to actually meet you.” He struggled to wrench the curtains closed, and the screaming finally stopped. 

“Yes, Master Sirius?” The elf asked, appearing in the hallway. 

“We have guests, please could you bring us some tea?” He asked, taking the stairs two at a time. He watched as Beatrice reached down and swept Minerva out of Marlene’s arms. A muscle in Sirius’s jaw twitched, but he bit his tongue. She took the baby across the room and sat down with her in an armchair. 

“Hi there Gorgeous, what’s your name?” Beatrice cooed. 

“Probably something like Gemini or Aquarius.” Jeremy laughed, sitting on the arm of the chair and looking down at the baby. “Those are the sort of airy fairy names your family use, right _Sirius_?”

“Jeremy, be nice.” Gordon McKinnon warned. Sirius shot Jeremy a filthy look. 

“Her name is Minerva.” Marlene smiled, reaching over and squeezing Sirius’s hand. Jeremy snorted. 

“You know what, Jezza—” Sirius was cut off by Kreacher entering with a tea tray. “Thank you, Kreacher.” He said, taking it from him and setting it on the table. 

“You have a house elf?” Beatrice asked Marlene when Kreacher had left the room, her eyes flashing.

“This is his home.” Marlene mumbled defensively. Minerva began to cry and Beatrice tried, unsuccessfully, to calm her down. 

Gordon reached down and took her from her arms. “Here, let Grandad try.”

“Careful.” Sirius said, trying to stay polite, but she was too small for this baby-pass-the-parcel. 

“I know how to hold a baby.” He muttered. “I think she might need changing.” He said to Marlene.

“I’ll do it.” Sirius said, glad of the excuse to leave the room, he usually liked Marlene’s parents just fine but today they were really starting to piss him off. Gordon handed her to him with an odd expression and Sirius took her up to the nursery. “Shall we just hide up here until they leave? Yeah, you’re right, your Mum would kill us.” 

“—we’re not moving back home.” Sirius paused on the landing outside the parlour, Marlene was having a whispered argument with her mother. “There won’t be room for the three of us when Nicole is home from school.” 

“If it was just you and Minerva there would.” Beatrice said quietly.

“You think I’m going to take our daughter and leave Sirius here alone?” Marlene asked with a mirthless laugh. “You can fuck right off.”

“Marlene! Look, we like Sirius, we do—” He heard Jeremy make a derisive noise. “It’s just—”

Sirius didn’t give her time to finish, he pushed the door open the rest of the way and crossed the room, setting Minerva carefully down in the bassinet before turning to face Marlene’s parents. “It’s just what?” He asked, not bothering to keep his voice pleasant.

“Well, it’s just that this is hardly an appropriate house to raise a child…unless you’re planning on bringing up a little Death Eater?” Beatrice asked.

“Mum!” 

“Marlene, the house is a little bit dark.” Gordon said. Sirius prickled at this, he’d never felt the urge to defend Grimmauld Place before, but he and Marlene had been working so hard to make it feel like a home. So they hadn’t figured out how to get rid of some of the wall decorations yet, and they still hadn’t got around to clearing out the Drawing Room…but they were working on it. If Gordon thought it was dark now, he should’ve seen it a few months ago. 

“More than a little!” Beatrice said, shrilly now. “I saw the tapestry on my way up, _Toujours Pur_? I read French! And that prejudice-screaming portrait in the hall? My granddaughter will not be raised in this house!”

“That’s hardly your decision to make.” Marlene said quietly.

“The two of you can stay here, but your father and I are taking Minerva home with us.” Beatrice said, getting to her feet. 

“You can try.” Sirius said, his voice deadly, drawing his wand. Beatrice pulled out her own and Gordon stepped quickly between them, his hands raised.

“Bea, that’s enough. Obviously we’re not taking the baby, she’s a day old.” Gordon warned.

“We are much better suited to raise her, we’ve brought up three children. Marlene is starting Auror training in a few months, are you telling me you’re going to be able to cope taking care of Minerva all day, everyday?” Beatrice challenged. Sirius’s grip on his wand tightened.

“What is that supposed to mean?” He asked, though he had a very good idea what she meant.

“It means,” Jeremy drawled, “you have can have a pretty short temper. I think Mum is worried about what’s going to happen to Minerva when you lose your cool.” Sirius felt as though Jeremy had punched him. He could _never_ hurt his daughter, no matter how angry he got. Yet Jeremy had managed to hit right on the fear that had plagued him most throughout Marlene’s pregnancy. 

“Get the fuck out.” Marlene said to him coldly, gesturing to the door.

“No one is worried about that.” Gordon said quickly, turning to his wife and son.

“I am.” Jeremy muttered, getting to his feet as well.

“Enough. Bea, put your wand away. Jeremy, apologise now. Sirius and Marlene are going to be excellent parents. We were just a bit concerned about the pure-blood propaganda all over the place.” Gordon explained, with the air of someone who had spent years diffusing arguments in his house. 

“Sorry.” Jeremy said, though he didn’t sound very sincere. Gordon poured out five cups of tea and handed them around. Still seething, Sirius took it with a forced ‘thank you’ and sat down beside the bassinet.


	38. L

Marlene was still fuming the next morning over what her mother and Jeremy had said. It wasn’t so much that she had been putting down the house, Marlene had almost expected that; Beatrice’s hatred for pure-blood mania rivalled even Sirius’s. It was their disparagement of Sirius that had awaked a new kind of fury in her; the insinuation that he would be anything but a wonderful father. She’d thought that it was important for them to meet Minerva early on, but now she was sorely wishing she hadn’t bothered insisting on that. Sirius had moped around the house for the rest of the day, every time she’d gone looking for him he’d retreated further into Grimmauld Place…and himself. His mood had unsettled Minerva too, it was like she could feel that her Daddy was unhappy. Sirius was putting on a good show now for Lily and James, but it was going to be a while before Marlene made the effort to see her mother again; she was even considering writing to Nicole had asking her if she wanted to spend Christmas here...more out of spite than anything else.

“‘sa baba!” Harry said, pointing at Minerva and looking up at Lily.

“That’s right, it’s a baby. She’s Uncle Sirius and Aunty Marlene’s baby. Her name is Minerva.” Lily told him. Marlene imagined it would probably be some time before Harry learnt how to actually say Minerva, though she was sure the early attempts would be quite adorable.

“She’s beautiful.” Lily smiled, holding down Harry’s hands to keep him from grabbing at Minerva as Marlene placed her gently in James’s arms. She really appreciated that he had asked if he could hold her, she’d hated the way that her mother had just come in and snatched Minerva out of her arms.

“Yeah.” James said. “Shame she looks so much like you though, Padfoot.” 

“Mate, you’re lucky you’re holding my daughter.” Sirius warned. Marlene smiled, she liked the way it sounded when he said ‘my daughter’ — fatherhood suited him.

“Minerva is a lovely name,” Lily said, “ and I’m sure you made McGonagall very happy.”

“She cried.” Sirius said. “Minerva Josephine Black…I wanted to use McKinnon and just let the name Black die out, but Marlene wouldn’t let me.”

Marlene gave an exasperated sigh. Names were so important to her, even when you had nothing else, you had your name. “I want her to share your last name, she should be proud to have you as a father, proud to be a part of you.” Sirius opened his mouth to speak but closed it again, apparently lost for words. It broke her heart that he couldn’t see himself the way that she saw him. It was like his family had destroyed that part of him, they’d told him over and over that he was a disappointment and a failure and now he couldn’t believe anything else.

“I should get going.” Sirius said, a little faintly. He kissed Lily and Harry on the cheek and James made Minerva give him a goodbye wave. Marlene followed him up to the hallway.

“You don’t have to go, Dorcas requested me…I don’t mind going.” Marlene said, grabbing his hand to stop him opening the front door. She didn’t want him working for the Order when he seemed so _sad_. Sad led to stupid and reckless…though really, was that any different from how he always was?

“Marley, don’t be ridiculous. You gave birth two days ago.” He muttered, running his hands up and down her arms. “I’ll be back soon…I’ve got a reason to come home now.” He teased with the first real grin she’d seen since her parents had visited.

“I hate you.” She smiled, shaking her head.

“I really love you, Marley. So fucking much, I feel like my heart is over-spilling with it. My soul must have known your’s since the beginning of time. You’re a force of nature; you're like the ocean, or lightning, or the brightest star in the sky. You make me feel _alive_ , and safe, and like a good man—”

“Sirius—” She breathed, her eyes brimming with tears.

“I don’t tell you enough.” There was an urgency in his voice now. “I know we say we hate each other, and we know what we really mean…but I love you so fucking much, Marlene McKinnon. You my reason for doing anything, and you have been for a long time now.”

“Bet you wish you hadn’t already proposed…this would’ve made one hell of a proposal.” She said, her voice a little thicker than normal. She loved him completely, he was right; it was as though their souls had known each other since the beginning of time. She threw her arms around his neck and kissed him. She could feel him smiling that beautiful, warm smile against her lips. “I’ll see you later.” She breathed, pulling away. She watched him leave before returning back down to the kitchen.

“She’s so tiny, Harry definitely wasn’t this small.” James said, letting her curl her little fist around his finger. 

“Five pounds and two ounces.” Marlene said, pottering around the stove making tea so they wouldn’t see how watery her eyes were. “She’d have probably been a bit bigger if we’d made it the whole nine months.” She really hoped it wasn’t something that she’d done…or not done. Everything had worked out fine, but it could just as easily not have. It wasn’t like she’d had a particularly stress free pregnancy, between getting hit a couple of times with the Cruciatus curse, to staying up night after night trying to figure out who the spy was, to apprehending Peter, and then Sirius’s hearing…it was a miracle that Minerva was so healthy. “You really underplayed how much childbirth hurts, Lily.” Marlene muttered, and Lily laughed, a little guiltily.

“I didn’t want to scare you too much.” She admitted. “It was all worth it though right?”

Marlene looked at her little girl in James’s arms and nodded, it had definitely been worth it.


	39. LI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> December 1976

The Potters were hosting Christmas this year, which worked out well for Marlene as it meant that she could spend the day with Sirius after all. He, the three Potters and the five McKinnons were all sat in the living room exchanging presents and drinking sherry (though after Nicole had taken a sip from her glass and pulled a face at the taste, Beatrice finished hers off). James chucked a present across the room for Nicole to catch; he’d still bothered wrapping it even though every year he gave her a bag of Nik Naks from the Muggle shop down the road.

“Thanks.” She grinned. It was a pretty subpar present, but Marlene knew that Nicole liked that she got a joke present even though James was Marlene’s friend, and especially because he’d never gotten Jeremy anything. 

“Don’t eat them before dinner.” Gordon warned. 

Marlene handed Sirius his and he unwrapped a copy of _The Picture of Dorian Gray._ He opened the first page. “ _Just in case I bore you on our next date_ ,” he read with a laugh and kissed her cheek. “Not much chance of that.” He handed her a small box, mumbling that it wasn’t much, but inside was little silver lion on a chain. ‘Not much’ didn’t really feel accurate.

“It’s beautiful, thank you.” She smiled, as he helped her fasten the neckless’s clasp. Sirius went to take the book up to his room and in the distraction of the table being set, Marlene followed him. He turned at the sound of the door closing behind her. “You’re a lot tidier here than you are anywhere else.” She grinned, looking around. His clothes were all put away and his bed made. A stark contrast to how his room at Grimmuald Place had been, and his dormitory…though the latter wasn’t entirely his fault. 

“Yeah, well, I still feel like a bit of a guest here.” He shrugged. “You look really nice, by the way.” Marlene spun on the spot, the hem of her velvet dress floating around her thighs. 

“You don’t look so bad yourself, not sure there’s many guys who can pull off a burgundy waistcoat quite so well.” She said.

“I look good in everything.” He laughed. Nothing too, she imagined. He waved his wand and mistletoe sprouted from the ceiling above their heads.

“Any excuse, Black?” Marlene asked, closing the distance between them. The kiss was heated, even more so than the one they’d shared in the library before term had ended (she’d enjoyed playing that one over in her mind quite a few times). She was slightly taller than him in the high heels that she was wearing but he didn’t seem to care...anyway, it became irrelevant when he gently pushed her down onto the bed.

“If you want to stop any time, just say so. No pressure.” He said seriously; he was trying so hard not to be Craig, but he didn’t have to worry. 

“I know.” She said, kissing just below his jaw as she undid the buttons of his waistcoat. Sirius slipped a hand into her underwear and she gasped against his skin. He was good at this.

“Mum says dinner’s—” James said, opening the bedroom door but breaking off suddenly and turning his back. Sirius pulled away as quickly as if he’d been burned and placed a pillow over his lap. “—ready.” James finished faintly. “Seriously?! When we’re all sitting downstairs?” 

Marlene stood up, straightening her dress. “Would it have killed you to knock?” She muttered. “Sirius, are you coming?” She asked. James’s shoulders began to shake in a fit of silent giggles at her poor word choice.

“I’ll catch you up, I’m going to need a minute.” Sirius said, flushing a horrible clash with the burgundy he was wearing. 

Throughout dinner, every time James caught Marlene’s eye they had to suppress their laughter, she was sure that she’d cracked a rib with the effort, but took until dessert for Sirius’s embarrassment to turn into amusement. She wondered if the problem was that James had caught him with her specifically, as he’d never seemed to be this embarrassed at being caught with other girls. After they’d eaten, they moved back to the living room and split themselves into pairs for Mrs Potter’s Christmas quiz, it had been several years since Marlene’d had a Christmas with Mr and Mrs Potter and it was a tradition that she loved. 

“I’m going with Sirius!” Nicole said quickly, throwing herself onto the sofa beside him.

“What about me, Nik Nak?” James asked, his hand on his heart as though she had mortally wounded him.

“I’m just more handsome.” Sirius claimed, smugly.

“Your loss Nic. I’m smarter than both those idiots.” She said, but Nicole just shrugged.

Once she'd won the quiz — Marlene had always been good at motivating James’s competitive side…she had no use for the laidback and easy going James Potter when her intellectual honour was on the line — she and Jeremy broke in the chess sets they’d gotten in their crackers while Mr Potter sat at her shoulder offering unhelpful advice…though this wasn’t nearly as distracting as James and Sirius’s very noisy game of Exploding Snap, or her parents and Mrs Potter singing tipsily along to Celestina Warbeck. When Jeremy won Marlene brought her knee irritably up to the underside of the table, sending the pieces flying across the room as they shouted their protests. Loosing to Jeremy aside — something that always put her in a bad mood — Marlene thought that this might just have been one of her best Christmases.


	40. LII

“You had another uncle.” Sirius said softly to Minerva as he pushed open Regulus’s bedroom door. He’d been walking around the house trying to get her to sleep and it seemed to be working. “He joined the Death Eaters and got himself killed. Stupid git.” He sat down on the bed and looked around. It had been five years, but it was exactly as he’d remembered it, emerald and silver, the crest painted above the bed. Kreacher had even kept if free of dust. “That tapestry downstairs, the names on it are your list of who not to be. Your Uncle Regulus is one of them.” He warned her. 

Sirius got up and crossed to the desk, opening the draws. Served him right for all the times he’d gone through Sirius’s stuff. An ink bottle had spilled in the top draw, coving photographs and parchment with black ink. In the next draw, beneath a copy of _Advanced Potion-Making_ , there was a letter addressed to him. Frowning, he opened it one handed, with some difficulty.

_Dear Sirius,_

_Please don’t throw this letter away before you read it. I wish I had more time to say everything I want to. You were right about so many things, and I know now that I made a terrible mistake choosing the side that I did. But I’m trying to fix it. The Dark Lord has created a Horcrux (concealed a piece of his soul inside another object, he cannot be killed until it has been destroyed). He used Kreacher to hide it, I volunteered him but I had a horrible feeling. I called him home but when he came back…he wasn’t right. I told him to describe the Horcrux, it was a locket, and I’ve created a replica. Tonight I’m going to order Kreacher to take me there and I’ll switch them. I’m writing this to you in case I don’t make it back. You need to know if your side hopes to stand a chance._

_I am so deeply sorry for everything, and I hope my actions tonight will begin to right all the wrongs that I’ve committed._

_Your Brother,_

_Reg_

Sirius swallowed down the lump in his throat, his heart pounding in his chest. Regulus had drawn a little picture of the locket at the bottom of the page. It looked oddly familiar…if he’d thrown it out in his purge of the house’s contents…

He couldn’t shout for Marlene, Minerva had fallen asleep in his arms, so he hurried down to the Drawing Room as fast as he could without disturbing the baby and pressed the letter into her hands, his eyes wild. “Read this.” He urged. Marlene read the letter twice — he could see in the way her eyes moved — before she looked at the cabinet. Sirius followed her gaze, and half hidden behind a copy of _Nature’s Nobility: A Wizarding Genealogy_ , was an ornate locket with a twinkling ’S’ that caught the late afternoon sun streaming in through the window. Sirius seized hold of Marlene’s wrist as she went to pick it up. “Don’t, it might be dangerous, let me.” He said, trying to hand Minerva to her.

Marlene gave him a defiant look. “It obviously got here somehow.” She said and snatched off of the shelf stubbornly…though he was sure that it was more out of spite than anything else. “See, I’m fine.” She said, smugly. _Stupid too_ …though it wasn’t worth the fight to say it out loud. “Your brother must have made it back then…or is this still the fake one?” 

“Kreacher!” Sirius called, and the elf appeared in the drawing room with a crack. “I want you to tell me what happened to Regulus.” He’d never cared to find out before…something like guilt twinged somewhere deep in the recesses of his mind, the same part that held the memories of them chasing each other up and down the stairs, or the odd occasion, when they were very young, that Regulus and slipped into bed beside him after a bad dream. In the letter that Narcissa had sent telling him that Regulus was dead, she’d said that he’d been having second thoughts about the things he was being told to do…Sirius had just assumed that he’d been killed by another Death Eater. Kreacher looked from Sirius, to Marlene, to the locket in her hand and burst into loud and ugly wails of anguish. Minerva stirred in his arms but didn’t wake up. “Kreacher, stop cr—”

“Don’t you dare.” Marlene snapped at Sirius. She dropped to her knees beside Kreacher and placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. “It’s okay, Kreacher, take your time.” She soothed.

“Master Regulus ordered Kreacher to take him to the cave he had visited with the Dark Lord. We took the boat to the island with the basin. It was full of a potion…when the Dark Lord made Kreacher drink it he had seen terrible things. Master Regulus ordered Kreacher to switch the lockets when the basin was empty….to leave with out him…and to destroy the real locket.” Kreacher gasped, tears rolling thick and fast down his face. “Master Regulus drank all of the potion…” Sirius was hit with such a sudden wave of affection for his little brother that he had to steady himself against the cabinet for a moment. “Kreacher swapped the lockets and watched as Master Regulus was dragged into the water…Kreacher tried to destroy the locket…Kreacher punished himself and tried again…Kreacher tried everything knew but he could not destroy Master Regulus’s locket!” He sobbed. 

“It’s alright, Kreacher, thank you for telling us this. Marlene and I will make sure that it’s destroyed.” Sirius said hoarsely. They would take it to Dumbledore, he always knew what to do. Marlene handed Kreacher a tissue and he wiped his eyes. Sirius bent down in front of him and carefully handed Minerva over. “Please will you put Minerva in her cot?” He watched as Kreacher nodded and left the room, before turning to Marlene. 

For the first time Sirius could remember he felt true, pure, and unadulterated hope. They were children who had come of age in a war. For as long as any of them could remember they’d been darning the holes left by the darkness with as much laughter and love as they could find, and praying that it was strong enough to hold their lives together. Layering themselves in joy and courage like it was armour, until they could pretend that they could no longer feel the fear and sadness lurking beneath the surface. But now… _it felt like they could win._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So guys, this is it...I've reached the end. Thank you all for reading and commenting. I hope you've enjoyed it, I've certainly loved writing it.
> 
> I've fallen in love with these characters all over again so I'll be back in the next couple of days (I've got plenty of time on my hands now that the country is under lockdown) with a new work, one with a broader focus so that I can explore other characters more.


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